Texsox Posted March 18, 2019 Share Posted March 18, 2019 Have a will and a list of accounts, perhaps a whole to do list when you die. My kids are dealing with a horrible mess. My ex died unexpectedly and left a giant mess that will take months to sort out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Y2HH Posted March 18, 2019 Share Posted March 18, 2019 Sorry for your/their loss, Tex. I personally keep a printout of all important accounts (account #'s), my master password to my phone, life insurance policies, credit cards, etc. in a safety deposit box, just in case something like this were to occur. It's hard enough for loved ones you leave behind to deal with devastating loss, adding the burden of them having to track down everything you own or owe is the last thing they need at such a time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heads22 Posted March 18, 2019 Share Posted March 18, 2019 My dad died in 2017 and we're still dealing with the aftermath, even with a will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Sir Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 Sorry for both of your losses. My wife recently had a probate court battle with her birth father's family over his estate. She was adopted at birth, but she had a strong relationship with him until his death in 2017. His family denied that there was a will (which is fishy, since he was a financial planner) and even went so far as to claim that he wasn't my wife's actual father (an absurd claim that his own actions never suggested). They smiled through their teeth at us at his funeral, and turned into a bunch of assholes as soon as money was involved. My wife's only request was to be given some of his old clothes so she could make a quilt out of them, and they couldn't even oblige that. Fuck them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Texsox Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 This will be easier. She was the only child of only children. Literally her only family currently loving are our two kids. My daughter isn’t interested in much and wants her brother to have most everything. I really don’t see it spinning out of control. But what a mess. It will take a month just to clean out her apartment. She hadn’t unboxed from her move. She was moving from a three bedroom house temporarily into an apartment and just left most of her stuff in boxes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soxfan49 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 (edited) I work in the financial services industry and my advice on this is to consolidate. I know it sounds cool to have money with JP Morgan, Morgan Stanley, BMO Harris, Chase, Northwestern Mutual, Merrill Lynch, Voya and every other company in the world, but the fact is, it'll be much easier for your family if it's all in one spot and you're double checking your beneficiaries often. Tip: don't forget to add beneficiaries to your bank accounts. My dad passed two years ago and had money all over. Still, my mom is trying to get it all into one spot and is still discovering funds unexpectedly. Going to your county building and adding a death deed on your home or putting your home into a trust (much more costly) are good plans, too. If you go route #2, make sure you have a bank account opened in that name because the funds from the home sale will come to the name of the trust. Edited March 20, 2019 by soxfan49 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bob Sacamano Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 (edited) My family has learned this lesson. My mom and aunt have been dealing with my grandma (who passed away in September), my 91-year old grandpa, my great uncle who is having walking/balance issues, and my brain damaged aunt. We moved my great uncle into an assisted living place at the beginning of 2018, cleaned out his townhouse and sold it only to have to do the same thing to my grandpa and my brain damaged aunt over the past couple months. My parents say they will be down-sized in a condo or one level townhouse well before they are 80. Honestly, probably before 70. Edited March 20, 2019 by soxfan2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heads22 Posted April 6, 2019 Share Posted April 6, 2019 I'm going to yell it from the rooftops again GET YOUR SHIT IN ORDER IF YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raBBit Posted April 8, 2019 Share Posted April 8, 2019 On 4/6/2019 at 11:47 AM, Heads22 said: I'm going to yell it from the rooftops again GET YOUR SHIT IN ORDER IF YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN QFT Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Allen Posted April 8, 2019 Share Posted April 8, 2019 My mom died in 1999 and my dad is still around doing pretty well. He is a retired lawyer who did pretty well for himself. He did re-marry leaving some complication, but his estate is going to be evenly divided between me and my two siblings. We have already met with the lawyers. One told me the day after my dad goes,his money will be in our accounts. He is my dad's former assistant and a former IRS attorney. His house, his wife gets to live in as long as she likes, if she outlives him. But she is one day younger than my dad, and has a couple of physical issues. It isn't a ranch, her daughters don't really help her, it's a large house in a nice neighborhood and she would be responsible for the taxes, I couldn't imagine her staying long. And when that gets sold, it's a 3 way split as well. Everything is about as in order as can be. That said, I'm sure there will still be a couple of issues. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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