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Favorite Cub-Hating One-liners or Quotes

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Us Sox fans are so tired of being put second rate to The North-side Yuppy-ville, that we all have some quotes or one-liners as to why we hate the Cubs.

Here are 2 of mine! Give me some of yours, because I'm continuously being bashed and put down by Cub fans and I need some more fun ammunition!

1) "If The Cubs were 161-0 and someone gave me a box seat to the last game, I still wouldn't go!"

2) If The Cubs were in the world series with Iraq, I'd be waving Sadaam Hussein Flags!"

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"My favorite two baseball teams are the White Sox and whoever plays the Cubs."

 

"Wrigley Field - The World's Largest Singles Bar."

 

"If the Cubs and their fans fell off the face of the Earth, I wouldn't give two s***s."

 

"Steve Bartman for President."

 

"Don't bother with the Heimlich Maneuver - he's a Cubs fan and he's used to choking. And if he dies, who gives a f*ck?"

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Can't mention Cub garbage without the famous Lee Elia quote:

 

"I'll tell you one (expletive) thing, I hope we get (expletive) hotter than (expletive) just to stuff it up them 3,000 (expletive) people that show up every (expletive) day. Because if they're the real Chicago (expletive) fans, they can kiss my (expletive) right downtown, and PRINT IT! ...

 

"Eighty-five percent of the (expletive) world's working and the other 15 come out here, a (expletive) playground for the (expletive). Rip them (expletive). Rip them country (expletive) like the (expletive) players."

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Can't mention Cub garbage without the famous Lee Elia quote:

I have heard this before, but can someone provide background information on this, because I know nothing about it.

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2) If The Cubs were in the world series with Iraq, I'd be waving Sadaam Hussein Flags!"

That one is too much for me.

 

 

This one from Pastime:

"Wrigley Field - The World's Largest Singles Bar."

How about...'Wrigley Field - The World's Largest Urinal.'

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I have heard this before, but can someone provide background information on this, because I know nothing about it.

Gladly.

 

Lee Elia was managing the Cubs ( I'm pretty sure it was 1983, but I could easily be wrong about that ), and the Wrigley "faithful" had just given their heroes a hearty booing after yet another lackluster effort.

Elia was upset about the loss, but when some sap reporter asked about the "crowd" ( they didn't draw that well before 84 ), Elia went off.

 

It's a classic rant, and still funny to this day.

Hey, at least the Cub fans back then paid enough attention to understand that they should boo bad teams...

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Gladly.

 

Lee Elia was managing the Cubs ( I'm pretty sure it was 1983, but I could easily be wrong about that ), and the Wrigley "faithful" had just given their heroes a hearty booing after yet another lackluster effort.

Elia was upset about the loss, but when some sap reporter asked about the "crowd" ( they didn't draw that well before 84 ), Elia went off.

 

It's a classic rant, and still funny to this day.

Hey, at least the Cub fans back then paid enough attention to understand that they should boo bad teams...

It was a group of print reporters and Les Grobstein (WLS? WLUP?) was the only guy there with a tape recorder. It became an instant hit. Steve Dahl played it about 100 times. I still laugh my ass off. Poor Lee.

 

"I think my baby is a Cubs fan."

"why"

"I saw him reading the sports pages and he had the newspaper upside down. It was the only way the Cubs would be on top."

 

"Let's lose two today!" Between innings of a doubleheader when everyone around me assumed I was a Cub fan.

 

That can be so cool. If you are sitting around Cub fans and say "the Cubs suck." they get feisty. if you say "we suck" they will comiserate.

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I wouldn't root for the cubs if they were playing the taliban.

 

The cubs have as much of a chance of winning the world series as ron santo does of winning an asskicking contest

 

 

Special agent, Dale Cooper, FBI

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This is from a WSI article...and I loved it....

 

"To a Sox Fan's way of thinking, anyone who calls their team "lovable losers" deserves exactly what they get. That's the only reason we get satisfaction from the Cubs losing. When they lose, everything is right in our universe; for truly they deserved it."

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