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In a relationship


mreye

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Steff usually posts stuff like this, but I'll beat her to it this time. :P

 

 

Guide to Women's Self-Desciptions in the Peronsals:

 

 

 

Her Description..................Realty

 

40-ish........................................49

 

Adventurous.......................Slept with everyone

Athletic....................................No tits

Average looking............................Ugly

Beautiful.........................Pathological liar

Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills

Emotionally Secure......................On medication

Feminist.......................................Fat

Free spirit.................................Junkie

Friendship first.......................Former slut

Fun.........................................Annoying

New-Age................Body hair in the wrong places

Old-fashioned.............................No BJs

Open-minded............................Desperate

Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk

Professional....................................b****

Voluptuous...................................Very Fat

Large frame................................Hugely Fat

Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker

 

 

DICTIONARY OF WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want..

5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry

6. We need to talk = You're in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = You better not

8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!

10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?

 

 

DICTIONARY OF MEN'S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = Let's have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you

8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you

 

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you

11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

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