Andy Rooney

[AddisonStSox]

Andy Rooney said on "60 Minutes" a few weeks back:

 

 

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens...Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door. Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

 

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, that is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?

 

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others be cause they are different, weird, or tick me off.

 

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the Law of Probability.

 

I believe that if you are selling me a milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!

 

My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours. I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry a--  if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word "freeze" or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

 

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for! any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

 

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their interpretations.

 

I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor.

 

I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.

 

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.

 

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!"

 

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French fries!

 

I am sick of "Political Correctness." I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa; so how can they be "African-Americans"? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe. I am proud to be from America and nowhere else.

 

And if you don't like my point of view, tough...

 

You Can Put It On The Board...Yes!

[Texsox]

And Andy Rooney had this to say

 

Moreover, Rooney himself denied it in 2003, saying:

About a year ago, I became aware of a more serious theft of my name and it is so hurtful to my reputation that it calls for legal action against the thief. Hundreds of people have written asking if I really wrote the 20 detestable remarks made under my name that have had such wide circulation on the Internet.

 

[...]

 

Some of the remarks, which I will not repeat here, are viciously racist and the spirit of the whole thing is nasty, mean and totally inconsistent with my philosophy of life. It is apparent that the list of comments has been read by hundreds of thousands of Americans, many of whom must believe that it accurately represents opinions of mine that I don't dare express in my column or on television. It is seriously damaging to my reputation.

 

Linked at Snopes

 

Rooney called the remarks "detestable" Put it on the board YES!!!

[Texsox]

And this gem was attributed to George Carlin, again totally false, not from him, but kind of funny in spots. It's amazing to me how these things can get started and continue for years and years. I guess the original authors of these pieces were embarassed to put their names on them. I know I would be.

 

Yes, I Guess I am A BAD American.

 

I like big cars, big boats, big houses, and naturally - big tits.

 

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid-level governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies. I don't care about appearing compassionate.

 

I think playing with toy guns doesn't make you a killer.

 

I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason.

 

I think I'm doing better than the homeless.

 

I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized.

 

I have the right not to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird or piss me off.

 

I know what SEX is and there are not varying degrees of it. Hell, just ask my wife.

 

I don't celebrate Kwanzaa. But if you want to that's fine; just don't feel like everyone else should have to.

 

I believe that if you are selling me a Dairy queen shake, pack of cigarettes, or hotel room you do it in English.

 

As of matter of fact, if you are an American citizen you should speak English. My father and grandfather shouldn't have to die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come disrespect ours.

 

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word freeze or stop in English, See the previous line.

 

If I received a blow job from one of my subordinate employees in my office, it wouldn't be a private matter or my personal business. I would have been FIRED immediately.

 

I know how to count votes and I feel much safer letting a machine with no political affiliation recount when needed.

 

I know what the definition of lying is.

 

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you qualify for any special loan programs, gov't sponsored bank loans, etc., so you can you can open a hotel, c-store, trinket shop, or any damn thing else.

 

I thought the Taco Bell dog was funny.

 

I want them to bring back safe and sane fireworks.

 

I believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or Marilyn Manson sang, but that doesn't mean I want to listen to that crap from someone else's car when I'm stopped at a red light.But I respect your right to.

 

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster or Jack In The Box.

 

I don't want to eat or drink anything with the words light, Lite, or fat-free on the package.

 

I did not go to some foreign country and risk my life in vain and defend our constitution so that decades later you can tell me it's a living document ever changing and is open to interpretation.

 

I don't hate the rich.

 

I don't pity the poor.

 

I know wrestling is fake.

 

I've never owned or was a slave, and a large percentage or our forefathers weren't wealthy enough to own one either.

 

I think you can respect and admire women while mentally undressing them.

 

I believe a self-righteous liberal with a cause is more dangerous than a Hell's Angel with an attitude.

 

I want to know which church is it exactly where the "Rev." Jesse Jackson preaches; and besides what exactly is his job function.

 

I don't care where Ellen puts her tongue.

 

I own a gun, you can own a gun, and any red blooded American should be allowed to own a gun, but if you use it in a crime then you will serve the time. A rubber band and a paper clip is a dangerous weapon in the hands of someone with malicious intent.

 

I worry about dying before I get even.

 

I didn't take the initiative in inventing the Internet.

 

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it pisses you off, invent the next operating system that's better and put your name on the building. Ask your buddy that invented the Internet to help you.

 

I don't believe in hate crime legislation. Even suggesting it pisses me off. You're telling me that someone who is a minority, gay, disabled, another nationality, or otherwise different from the mainstream of this country has more value as a human being that I do as a white male. Hell, if someone kills anyone, I'd say that it's a hate crime.

 

I like the convenience of buying oranges from a sidewalk vendor or while I'm waiting at a stop-light, and I'm pretty sure the Latin midget selling them to me is glad she no longer lives in a refrigerator box in East LA or is sleeping in the streets of her home country.

 

We don't need more laws! Let's enforce the ones we already have.

 

I think turkey bacon, turkey beef, turkey fake anything sucks.

 

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes a parent with the balls to stand up to the kid and spank his butt and say "NO".

 

I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement.

 

I'll admit that the only movie that ever made me cry was Ole Yeller.

 

I didn't realize Dr. Seuss was a genius until I had a kid.

 

I will not be frowned upon or be looked down upon or be made to keep silent because I have these beliefs and opinions.

 

I thought this country allowed me that right I will not conform or compromise just to keep from hurting somebody's feelings.

 

I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise.

 

Yes, I guess by their definition, I'm a bad American.

[CubKilla]

Whoever wrote those pieces (obviously not left-wingers like Carlin and Rooney..... and I enjoy George Carlin, even saw him once at Bally's in Vegas), truer words have never been spoken..... in both cases (Elia's Cub fan rant not withstanding).

 

Bill Cosby's recent rambling's have been right on too.

[YASNY]

Say what you will, but I basically agree with the principles espoused in both of those postings. There are some I have qualms about, but ingeneral, they work for me.