Politics Explained.

FEUDALI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. Your lord ta

k

e

s

s

ome of the mil

k

.

 

PURE

S

OCIALI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. The government ta

k

e

s

them and put

s

them in a barn with everyone el

s

e'

s

cow

s

. You have to ta

k

e care of all of the cow

s

. The government give

s

you a

s

much mil

k

a

s

you need.

 

BUREAUCRATIC

S

OCIALI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. The government ta

k

e

s

them and put them in a barn with everyone el

s

e'

s

cow

s

. They are cared for by ex-chic

k

en farmer

s

. You have to ta

k

e care of the chic

k

en

s

the government too

k

from the chic

k

en farmer

s

. The government give

s

you a

s

much mil

k

and egg

s

a

s

the regulation

s

s

ay you need.

 

FA

S

CI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. The government ta

k

e

s

both, hire

s

you to ta

k

e care of them and

s

ell

s

you the mil

k

.

 

PURE COMMUNI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. Your neighbor

s

help you ta

k

e care of them, and you all

s

hare the mil

k

.

 

RU

S

S

IAN COMMUNI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. You have to ta

k

e care of them, but the government ta

k

e

s

all the mil

k

.

 

CAMBODIAN COMMUNI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. The government ta

k

e

s

both of them and

s

hoot

s

you.

 

DICTATOR

S

HIP: You have two cow

s

. The government ta

k

e

s

both and draft

s

you.

 

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cow

s

. Your neighbor

s

decide who get

s

the mil

k

.

 

REPRE

S

ENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cow

s

. Your neighbor

s

pic

k

s

omeone to tell you who get

s

the mil

k

.

 

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cow

s

. At fir

s

t the government regulate

s

what you can feed them and when you can mil

k

them. Then it pay

s

you not to mil

k

them. Then it ta

k

e

s

both,

s

hoot

s

one, mil

k

s

the other and pour

s

the mil

k

down the drain. Then it require

s

you to fill out form

s

accounting for the mi

s

s

ing cow

s

.

 

PURE ANARCHY: You have two cow

s

. Either you

s

ell the mil

k

at a fair price or your neighbor

s

try to ta

k

e the cow

s

and

k

ill you.

 

LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALI

S

M: You have two cow

s

. You

s

ell one and buy a bull.

 

S

URREALI

S

M: You have two giraffe

s

. The government require

s

you to ta

k

e harmonica le

s

s

on

s

.

 

(Original

s

ource un

k

nown . . . thi

s

ver

s

ion expanded and Illuminated by

S

J.)