i moved away from oregon and i really fell in love with my best friend but im not quite sure if i should tell her or just move on i live in colorado for now and i dont know what i should do, pls help.

 

this question is mainly for the girls on the forum but guys opinions would be nice has well.

As a lady I can only say this, I don't know how old you are, but you need to think about a lot of things before you jump into a long distance relationship. They're a lot of work and a lot of commitment. It's super hard to start one over the distance. So I guess if I were you I would aks myself what I wanted out of this relationship. Or more basically, you said you just moved, I would ask myself if I really wanted a relationship or if I was just a little lost in my new surroundings and really missing my old comfortable things--I know I mistakenly fell "in love" when I went off to college. Might not happen to you--but I consider it a huge mistake that a little introspection could have really saved a lot of hurt to a guy I honestly cared for.

 

Anyway, so answer these questions then full steam ahead:

1.) What do you want out of this?

2.) Is it this girl that you want--or do you just miss home?

3.) In a similar vein, is this the type of girl that you think a long distance thing can work with?

4.) Do you think she'd be game for a long distance relationship or is she more of a physical closeness kind of gal?

and finally (and most importantly)

5.) If she says no can your friendship take it?

 

Anyway, that's my advice for what it's worth--take it or leave it. Best of luck!

As a lady I can only say this, I don't know how old you are, but you need to think about a lot of things before you jump into a long distance relationship. They're a lot of work and a lot of commitment. It's super hard to start one over the distance. So I guess if I were you I would aks myself what I wanted out of this relationship. Or more basically, you said you just moved, I would ask myself if I really wanted a relationship or if I was just a little lost in my new surroundings and really missing my old comfortable things--I know I mistakenly fell "in love" when I went off to college. Might not happen to you--but I consider it a huge mistake that a little introspection could have really saved a lot of hurt to a guy I honestly cared for.

 

Anyway, so answer these questions then full steam ahead:

1.) What do you want out of this?

2.) Is it this girl that you want--or do you just miss home?

3.) In a similar vein, is this the type of girl that you think a long distance thing can work with?

4.) Do you think she'd be game for a long distance relationship or is she more of a physical closeness kind of gal?

and finally (and most importantly)

5.) If she says no can your friendship take it?

 

Anyway, that's my advice for what it's worth--take it or leave it. Best of luck!

thanks alot im moving back in 5 months after this semester is over so it would only be a temp thing.

If you don't think your friendship will take a hit...I would definetly put it all on the line...Express your feelings, it helps...

I don't think you have to worry about your friendship. If you ask and she doesn't feel about you in that way, then thats that and you friendship will still survive. Now if you tell her your deeply in love with her and she doesn't feel that way, then I'd say different.

 

I mean if you think this is a person you'd like to get to know and you want to get into a serious relationship that could last some time and go somewhere, then I say why not, go for it. But if your not at that stage, then I don't think a long distance relationship is what you want.

 

Like chisoxygirl said, it depends on what you want and of course what she wants.

Best friend, long distance..... wait till you move back.

well that sucked i layed it all out on the line and she started crying and when i asked why she was crying she sayed she didnt know what to say and that she would call me tommorow, dont think it went very good but o well i had to find out, now im available to start a new school.

hey, at least you gave it a try, i backed down on 1 occasion that im kicking myself to this day about it... (6 years ago)

 

Let us know how it turns out....

hey, at least you gave it a try, i backed down on 1 occasion that im kicking myself to this day about it... (6 years ago) 

 

Let us know how it turns out....

rejection sucks but it feels a hell of a lot better than not knowing

not always sure a song helps but sometimes when something bugs me I sing a song over and over to work out some of the feelings

 

 

 

I need an easy friend

I do ... with an ear to lend

I do ... think you fit this shoe

I do ... won't you have a clue

 

I'll take advantage while

You hang me out to dry

But I can't see you every night for free

I do

 

I'm standing in your line

I do ... hope you have the time

I do ... pick a number too

I do ... keep a date with you

 

I'll take advantage while

You hang me out to dry

But I can't see you every night for free

 

I need an easy friend

I do ... with an ear to lend

I do ... think you fit this shoe

I do ... won't you have a clue

 

I'll take advantage while

You hang me out to dry

But I can't see you every night (x2)

For free

I do ... (x4)

not always sure a song helps but sometimes when something bugs me I sing a song over and over to work out some of the feelings

 

 

 

I need an easy friend

I do ... with an ear to lend

I do ... think you fit this shoe

I do ... won't you have a clue

 

I'll take advantage while

You hang me out to dry

But I can't see you every night for free

I do

 

I'm standing in your line

I do ... hope you have the time

I do ... pick a number too

I do ... keep a date with you

 

I'll take advantage while

You hang me out to dry

But I can't see you every night for free

 

I need an easy friend

I do ... with an ear to lend

I do ... think you fit this shoe

I do ... won't you have a clue

 

I'll take advantage while

You hang me out to dry

But I can't see you every night (x2)

For free

I do ... (x4)

im not that depressed i'm i was kind of expecting this answer just the not knowing was tearing me apart.

if she doesnt call back tonight what should i do, i really would like to still be her friend, but if she doesnt call back should i call her, give her a couple of days, or what??? im no good at these situations, and i think know she really cares about me i think she is just afraid of commetment.

Give her a day or two and then call her back. I wouldn't worry about it if you call her back. It won't look bad on your part or anything like that.

if she doesnt call back tonight what should i do, i really would like to still be her friend, but if she doesnt call back should i call her, give her a couple of days, or what??? im no good at these situations, and i think know she really cares about me i think she is just afraid of commetment.

Ya guys are far away. Trust me, long-distance relationships are really hard. There has to be very strong feelings to make a long-distance relationship work for even a little while. I am sure that it scares her how far away you are, and she may not want to set herself up into a situation where she is unsure of what to do. Trust me, don't bother with a long-distance relationship...especially if you guys have not dated before the distance was put between you two. Be friends with her and care for her, show her your always there. Wait until you get back before dating is considered. Support her in whatever she chooses to do.

i told her no matter what he she decided she would still be my best friend.

I had the same situation with my best friend. Unfortuantely things didn't work out between us for the girlfriend-boyfriend thing, but her and I are very good and very close friends.

 

If you do get turned down, it'll hurt for a while, for me it was about a week or so. Of course you'll start remembering certain times you've had with her and those can beat you up fairly well. Time cures all ills, and so does an actual girlfriend .

i told her no matter what he she decided she would still be my best friend.

She's probably embarressed she didn't see it coming. We ladies pride ourselves on "knowing" and "sensing" things. So, give it a few days to let her collect her thoughts--maybe send her an e-mail tomorrow afternoon to let her know you're ready to listen whenever she was ready to talk.

She's probably embarressed she didn't see it coming. We ladies pride ourselves on "knowing" and "sensing" things. So, give it a few days to let her collect her thoughts--maybe send her an e-mail tomorrow afternoon to let her know you're ready to listen whenever she was ready to talk.

thanks alot i really apreciate your help by the way we are both 18

well day 2 has passed do you think ill ever hear from her again? i personally think i scared her off.

It's only 2 days...Don't Sweat It...Call her again and act normal...

this is turning out to be the biggest mistake of my life she wont even resond to my msgs and i really hope she will still be my friend.

It's not a mistake. If she is not interested, she will forget about it in time. Just give her time to think.