Jump to content

What books are you reading?


Texsox
 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 59
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Brontes are evil.

 

specially charlotte and emily.

Wuthering Heights :puke

 

Here is what I have learned in my English class:

The Return of the Native sucks

Wuthering Heights sucks

Beowulf is ok.

Pride and Prejudice sucks

Grendel owns :headbang

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Beowulf is ok.

 

Grendel owns :headbang

Beowulf is pretty cool. Which translation did you read? It was part of a Monsters in Lit class I took last year. Any book that spends so miuch time drinking beer and telling tales has got to be good.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think we start reading that in April in my English class.  What's the premise of it?

It is the oldest English language story. It is an epic poem about a Danish hero who basically kicks the crap out of a couple monsters, he is King for a long time, then dies fighting a dragon. Lots of drinking and boasting in a Mead Hall.

 

You will read a translation from Old English which makes the story much easier to read.

 

I also recomend the Spark Notes study guide. You can read them at sparknotes.com or buy them at Barnes and Noble.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

so these people are like f*** A MONSTER IS KILLING US and beowulf is all WHERE IS THAT BEOTCH so he waits around and grendel shows up and grendels only weakness is his arms -cuz he is a trex- so beowulf tears off his arms and grendel yells OH s*** THAT HERTZ then beowulf beats grendel with his own arms

 

grendels mama shows up cause he is a mamas boy and his mom is all pissed off WHO THE f*** WHOOPED MY SON and beowulf says I DID, WHORE so they go back to the grendel house which is underwater or in a swamp or something and beowulf finds a sword down there and cuts out her falopian tubes and bring them back to the villagers who make him king with a crown of ovaries

 

later a dragon starts roasting chickens and children so beowulf must fight it so he goes in the cave and they simultaneously deliver fatal wounds to each other: to the dragons neck and to beowulf's cuticles. some dude shows up and hes like WOW THERE IS A LOT OF TREASURE IN THIS CAVE. INSTEAD OF BEING POORASS, STARVING PEASANTS WE CAN BE RICH but beowulf is like f*** NO, DOCTOR PEON, YOU BURY THAT TREASURE WITH ME IN A MOUND OF DIRT

 

the moral of the story is that you shouldnt f*** around with dinosaurs

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It is the oldest English language story. It is an epic poem about a Danish hero who basically kicks the crap out of a couple monsters, he is King for a long time, then dies fighting a dragon. Lots of drinking and boasting in a Mead Hall.

 

You will read a translation from Old English which makes the story much easier to read.

 

I also recomend the Spark Notes study guide. You can read them at sparknotes.com or buy them at Barnes and Noble.

I thought u were talkin bout Hamlet 1st time I read that. :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

so these people are like f*** A MONSTER IS KILLING US and beowulf is all WHERE IS THAT BEOTCH so he waits around and grendel shows up and grendels only weakness is his arms -cuz he is a trex- so beowulf tears off his arms and grendel yells OH s*** THAT HERTZ  then beowulf beats grendel with his own arms

 

grendels mama shows up cause he is a mamas boy and his mom is all pissed off WHO THE f*** WHOOPED MY SON and beowulf says I DID, WHORE so they go back to the grendel house which is underwater or in a swamp or something and beowulf finds a sword down there and cuts out her falopian tubes and bring them back to the villagers who make him king with a crown of ovaries

 

later a dragon starts roasting chickens and children so beowulf must fight it so he goes in the cave and they simultaneously deliver fatal wounds to each other: to the dragons neck and to beowulf's cuticles.  some dude shows up and hes like WOW THERE IS A LOT OF TREASURE IN THIS CAVE.  INSTEAD OF BEING POORASS, STARVING PEASANTS WE CAN BE RICH but beowulf is like f*** NO, DOCTOR PEON, YOU BURY THAT TREASURE WITH ME IN A MOUND OF DIRT

 

the moral of the story is that you shouldnt f*** around with dinosaurs

Yep, that's hou me mome tould it' to mee when I woas a wee lade. :headbang

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...