Jane Eyre for my least favorite class, AP Literature and Comp.

Brontes are evil.

 

specially charlotte and emily.

Brontes are evil.

 

specially charlotte and emily.

Wuthering Heights :puke

 

Here is what I have learned in my English class:

The Return of the Native sucks

Wuthering Heights sucks

Beowulf is ok.

Pride and Prejudice sucks

Grendel owns

Wuthering Heights sucks

 

I bet you didn't know that I am also Cliff for all eternity?

 

Ah who am I kididing, Wuthering Heights is haunting. It's all about larger-than-life passion in my world.

Beowulf is ok.

 

Grendel owns

Beowulf is pretty cool. Which translation did you read? It was part of a Monsters in Lit class I took last year. Any book that spends so miuch time drinking beer and telling tales has got to be good.

Beowulf is pretty cool. Which translation did you read? It was part of a Monsters in Lit class I took last year. Any book that spends so miuch time drinking beer and telling tales has got to be good.

I think we start reading that in April in my English class. What's the premise of it?

I think we start reading that in April in my English class.  What's the premise of it?

It is the oldest English language story. It is an epic poem about a Danish hero who basically kicks the crap out of a couple monsters, he is King for a long time, then dies fighting a dragon. Lots of drinking and boasting in a Mead Hall.

 

You will read a translation from Old English which makes the story much easier to read.

 

I also recomend the Spark Notes study guide. You can read them at sparknotes.com or buy them at Barnes and Noble.

Beowulf is ok

 

Biowolf was an awesome co-lead character from the original Rocky Horror Picture Show script.

 

Or should have been, anyway.

so these people are like f*** A MONSTER IS KILLING US and beowulf is all WHERE IS THAT BEOTCH so he waits around and grendel shows up and grendels only weakness is his arms -cuz he is a trex- so beowulf tears off his arms and grendel yells OH s*** THAT HERTZ then beowulf beats grendel with his own arms

 

grendels mama shows up cause he is a mamas boy and his mom is all pissed off WHO THE f*** WHOOPED MY SON and beowulf says I DID, WHORE so they go back to the grendel house which is underwater or in a swamp or something and beowulf finds a sword down there and cuts out her falopian tubes and bring them back to the villagers who make him king with a crown of ovaries

 

later a dragon starts roasting chickens and children so beowulf must fight it so he goes in the cave and they simultaneously deliver fatal wounds to each other: to the dragons neck and to beowulf's cuticles. some dude shows up and hes like WOW THERE IS A LOT OF TREASURE IN THIS CAVE. INSTEAD OF BEING POORASS, STARVING PEASANTS WE CAN BE RICH but beowulf is like f*** NO, DOCTOR PEON, YOU BURY THAT TREASURE WITH ME IN A MOUND OF DIRT

 

the moral of the story is that you shouldnt f*** around with dinosaurs

It is the oldest English language story. It is an epic poem about a Danish hero who basically kicks the crap out of a couple monsters, he is King for a long time, then dies fighting a dragon. Lots of drinking and boasting in a Mead Hall.

 

You will read a translation from Old English which makes the story much easier to read.

 

I also recomend the Spark Notes study guide. You can read them at sparknotes.com or buy them at Barnes and Noble.

I thought u were talkin bout Hamlet 1st time I read that.

so these people are like f*** A MONSTER IS KILLING US and beowulf is all WHERE IS THAT BEOTCH so he waits around and grendel shows up and grendels only weakness is his arms -cuz he is a trex- so beowulf tears off his arms and grendel yells OH s*** THAT HERTZ  then beowulf beats grendel with his own arms

 

grendels mama shows up cause he is a mamas boy and his mom is all pissed off WHO THE f*** WHOOPED MY SON and beowulf says I DID, WHORE so they go back to the grendel house which is underwater or in a swamp or something and beowulf finds a sword down there and cuts out her falopian tubes and bring them back to the villagers who make him king with a crown of ovaries

 

later a dragon starts roasting chickens and children so beowulf must fight it so he goes in the cave and they simultaneously deliver fatal wounds to each other: to the dragons neck and to beowulf's cuticles.  some dude shows up and hes like WOW THERE IS A LOT OF TREASURE IN THIS CAVE.  INSTEAD OF BEING POORASS, STARVING PEASANTS WE CAN BE RICH but beowulf is like f*** NO, DOCTOR PEON, YOU BURY THAT TREASURE WITH ME IN A MOUND OF DIRT

 

the moral of the story is that you shouldnt f*** around with dinosaurs

Yep, that's hou me mome tould it' to mee when I woas a wee lade.