hi8is Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 18 Things to do at Wal-Mart when your going to be in there for a long time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!" 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" 16. Take a snicker bar into a bathroom stall and wait until someone goes in the stall next to you. Then smash it inyour hand, reach under the divider and ask for toilet paper. 17. Hold a gum drop over a toilet, make loud grunting noises and then drop it in the bowl. 18. Prance around the store wearing a smiley face mask and hitting price signs, then wait to see if the prices go down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iwritecode Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 QUOTE(hi8is @ Sep 21, 2005 -> 10:14 PM) 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.... and see what happens. Actually, they use colors. Walk up to somebody and say "Code White" instead... QUOTE(hi8is @ Sep 21, 2005 -> 10:14 PM) 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. They made a new rule that anything put on layaway has to cost more than $5 (I don't remember the exact dollar amount but it's something like that). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Gleason Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 (edited) 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. I've never seen a carpeted area in a Wal-Mart. What is a code white, since I will never do any of these. Edited September 22, 2005 by Kid Gleason Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlaSoxxJim Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 QUOTE(Kid Gleason @ Sep 22, 2005 -> 10:41 AM) What is a code white, since I will never do any of these. That's when someone just Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Baybayay. . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iwritecode Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 (edited) QUOTE(Kid Gleason @ Sep 22, 2005 -> 09:41 AM) I've never seen a carpeted area in a Wal-Mart. What is a code white, since I will never do any of these. The clothing departments are usually carpeted. I've often seen a 'wet floor' sign on the rugs at the entrances in the winter. Those things get soaked... IIRC... white = customer/employee injury. black = bomb threat? red = fire blue = tornado? There were a few others but I never memorized them. I hated that job... Edited September 22, 2005 by Iwritecode Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knightni Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 (edited) 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. Aren't they all in packages? Where would you plug them in at? 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. It would be tough to nail tent stakes into the tile floor. Edited September 22, 2005 by knightni Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoxFan1 Posted September 22, 2005 Share Posted September 22, 2005 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and, then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" This one surely had me rolling! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Gleason Posted September 23, 2005 Share Posted September 23, 2005 So...I'm supposed to pitch a tent in the clothing department of Wal-Mart??? I believe jail time could be spent for that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FlaSoxxJim Posted September 23, 2005 Share Posted September 23, 2005 QUOTE(Kid Gleason @ Sep 23, 2005 -> 11:03 AM) So...I'm supposed to pitch a tent in the clothing department of Wal-Mart??? I believe jail time could be spent for that. I don't get it. . . "Pitch a tent" is one of my all-time favorite euphemisms for that particular phenomenon. That and "chub up." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1549 Posted September 23, 2005 Share Posted September 23, 2005 QUOTE(FlaSoxxJim @ Sep 22, 2005 -> 03:50 PM) That's when someone just Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Baybayay. . . ROTFL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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