witesoxfan Posted January 12, 2003 Share Posted January 12, 2003 He wants a mult-year contract that guarentees him $5.00 a game in the end and some of the guys pornos, so he can do something in his spare time....he wants this to be an enjoyable stay. He said he also wants around 20 24-packs of Mountain Dew and an X-Box, a PS2, and a Gamecube. He also wants the Cubs to lose and wants the ice cream man to stop buy the stadium twice a day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 13, 2003 Share Posted January 13, 2003 I take it Scott Boras is not his agent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chisoxfn Posted January 13, 2003 Share Posted January 13, 2003 I take it Scott Boras is not his agent. What are you talking about, he's going to hold out until they build an ice cream factory in the locker room Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted January 13, 2003 Share Posted January 13, 2003 I take it Scott Boras is not his agent. No....Arn Tellum is though. Â See, his name is Michaelangelo Deportenaldes....but he just goes by Mike Dep....but when he heard that Tellum was the agent of a lot of big-name guys, he decided to hire him. With him being in the 10-12 year old range, he didn't understand the big name concept quite yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 14, 2003 Share Posted January 14, 2003 You don't often see an Italian name and a Greek name coupled like that. That shorter name will sure come in handy when he has to fill in all those little boxes with his name on the SATs and ACTs. Â I am sure Mike Dep would settle for a lot less porn than zach23 would. Â And while he might want the ice cream, zach goes for that deep fried fat covered in sugar that Comiskey sells, the ice cream might be cheaper. Â But zach doesn't have an agent, so I say we sign zach, who didn't even ask for the $5 a day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zach23 Posted January 14, 2003 Share Posted January 14, 2003 Yep, I will pitch for the deep fried fat and porn. My daily porn budget will be quite large though. I will only sign a one year deal too. If I am good and they want me back, next year's contract must include sexual favors from top models and porn stars, a blue velvet suit, and a DVD player with all the episodes of "Monty Python" and "Fawlty Towers". And of course funnel cakes and peanut M&M's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted January 14, 2003 Share Posted January 14, 2003 Zach....as long as you are cheap, I'm sure JR and KW will be happy to have you on the roster. They may even bring in Miss Dorito in your avatar..... Â Top models? Deep fried fat and porn and all that stuff? Hell, I'll sign with the Sox if I get those kinds of things! Â Anyways....save me a funnel cake from your contract...I want to see what it feels like to eat a funnel cake that was given to you for pitching in a baseball game. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bjmarte Posted January 14, 2003 Share Posted January 14, 2003 Isn't that the same contract David Wells asked for when he signed with the Sox? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted January 14, 2003 Share Posted January 14, 2003 Isn't that the same contract David Wells asked for when he signed with the Sox? I think it was.....he may have asked for some new teeth and a personal trainer as well. Â He also wrote in small print that he wants a McDonald's constructed in his house, so he can have a Big Mac anytime he wants to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hotsoxchick1 Posted January 15, 2003 Share Posted January 15, 2003 Isn't that the same contract David Wells asked for when he signed with the Sox? isnt that how he got his wife???? hell she has got to be the only over priced hooker i know of who can wear a full leather outfit in 90 degree weather, sitting in the full sun and not even break a sweat.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 15, 2003 Share Posted January 15, 2003 The all leather outfit was already shrunk to the desired size so sweating was not possible. every duct was closed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zach23 Posted January 15, 2003 Share Posted January 15, 2003 I am a little overweight right now, but I don't have a bad back. I could probably do as well as David Wells did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 15, 2003 Share Posted January 15, 2003 you would do better, no doubt about it! Â plus, you are a much nicer human being. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zach23 Posted January 15, 2003 Share Posted January 15, 2003 Yeah, sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hotsoxchick1 Posted January 18, 2003 Share Posted January 18, 2003 I am a little overweight right now, but I don't have a bad back. I could probably do as well as David Wells did. you would cost us less too.. so we would be able to keep you around for a few seasons.... hell get kw on the phone we got our #3......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted January 18, 2003 Share Posted January 18, 2003 And if zach is serious about a porn star for the second year of his contract, we may as well get one for him this year. Â Not like I would know the name of any porn stars... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 18, 2003 Share Posted January 18, 2003 you must not know my screen name then... Â the work is hard... Â but all those starlets need to be satisfied. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supernuke Posted January 18, 2003 Share Posted January 18, 2003 you must not know my screen name then... the work is hard...  but all those starlets need to be satisfied. If the work is getting to be to much for you, you can hire me as your stunt dick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 18, 2003 Share Posted January 18, 2003 if you are up to it, sure! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted January 18, 2003 Share Posted January 18, 2003 I would think that zach would want a girl....but thanks for offering C-dub! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 19, 2003 Share Posted January 19, 2003 Lets get all these rumors condensed into 1 thread.....  First is.....  Bartolo Colon  For  Minor Leaguers? Honel/Borchard/Rauch? You get a 50% on that rumor, which is passing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
witesoxfan Posted January 19, 2003 Share Posted January 19, 2003 Damn...he posted that 2 months ago....little did we know we were going to get Colon for an incredibly lower price. Â Talk about a Blue Light sale. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 20, 2003 Share Posted January 20, 2003 Another one Floating around......  Cory Lidle  For  Mark Johnson/Carlos Lee what do we grade on this -  it was kind of something that happned, but only MJs name is right - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 20, 2003 Share Posted January 20, 2003 Another Rumor....... Â Frank Thomas signing with the Baltimore Orioles? can't knock this one since it was indeed a real rumor with some substance, glad it didn't go, but at the time if posting, it could have happened Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwsox Posted January 20, 2003 Share Posted January 20, 2003 Possible occurance... White Sox signing Jamie Moyer? I can't give points on this one, never heard that is was ever close to a possibility (note to self, thank God tonight). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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