Bonemer, I Hardly Know Her

Lol Schriff Dawg sucking Urquidy off and he immediately gives up a long ball

Seeing Urquidy just made me feel physically ill

Iowa is TEU, sir.

Keep working counts and get that pitch count up for Jobe. Get to the pen early.

Vargas had big pop to right center field, in the first half of the season

He threw a 3-2 fastball down the dick to Vargas, who fouled it off. Also a down the dick fastball to Colson, who missed it.

Colston Loveland!

Let's go! Huge hit

Vargas has missed a lot of hittable pitches lately

So...does this mean Romo isn't being cut?

Well, yeah. But Bart broke his hand

Fedde isn't to blame for this. It's all on DFAvis Martin

Start raining please

Davis Martin is such a fucking BUM. Ridiculous we're gonna lose this game

Just cover 3 scoreless innings and let the rain come.

The pitcher looks like Jesse Plemmons, and my dog looks like Kirsten Dunst

Ump doing us a favor...but that's a ridiculous ejection

Maybe Martin needs an ass whooping

My original plan was to do Eminem. But after discovering pictures of drug use and women in thongs in the book, my mom told me to do Jim Abbott instead,

Fun fact: I did a book report/speech in 7th grade about Jim Abbott. I did not cut off my hand for the project.

This pitcher looks like Jesse Plemmons aka Meth Damon

Chase is the best player on the team right now. Followed by Mune.

LOL REDS!

That just cost us a run

Sam's running motion looks like the T-1000