October 12, 200421 yr A friend of mine just got married in Las Vegas on Saturday. His brother and wife, me and my wife, another friend and his wife and another friend all got there on Wednesday and Thursday. His brother was the only one to see him before Friday at about 9:00 pm. Now, most of us haven't seen him in more than 2 years on account he lives in Baltimore. It turns out that his fiance didn't want him to be out too late. OK, fine. Friday night, time for the bachelor party. We hook up with him at 9. He says he has to be back by midnight, and no boobies. I'll concede the "no boobies" rule, but "midnight?" In Las Vegas? That's like 6 pm anywhere else. The wedding wasn't until 5:30pm! And he also said that she wanted him up by 7am. Makes no sense. To make a long story short, he didn't budge and went back at midnight. We all went out and had a good time without him. During the cajoling of trying to get him to stay out longer he stated, "You don't understand, this is about Nancy (His fiance)." His brother said, "No, you don't understand. This is about BOTH of you." I just think that a good marriage requires a bit of freedom and a pretty loose leash. My wife agrees and was pretty much more pissed off than I was about it. Thoughts?
October 12, 200421 yr Good god, that reminds me of one of my best friends. He is absolutely whipped. Other then me, he won't call any of his other friends unless she is busy doing something else. Its basically he guys, my girlfriend is busy so how about we hang out. In general if I ever got like that, I'm taking Shuf's approach. I don't see it happening though, I'm usually the one that says something incredibly stupid and pisses the girl off. I'm not one to toe and I tell it like it is a lot (I'll always love the simpsons for the tell it like it is episode). But no, that marriage won't last. One day he'll wake up and go what the hell am I doing, I'm living her life....when its supposed to be their life.
October 12, 200421 yr I am curious why they went to Vegas then. I'll be honest, neither Brian or I care too much about going to Vegas, it's not our style, but if you are going to have your wedding in Vegas, is that sort of stuff expected?
October 12, 200421 yr Ugh.. poor guy. I think you can guess my answer. :headshake Yeah we all see the way Jim is beaten down into his place
October 13, 200421 yr The marriage will work as long as he continues to do everything he is told to do...geez get a f***in pair and stand up for yourself....
October 13, 200421 yr Yeah we all see the way Jim is beaten down into his place That's exactly my point. Jim does what he wants, when he wants, as do I... but he respects me and vice versa. The strip club thing is so blase to me. Jim knows where his bread is buttered so I don't have issue with him going with his buddies (but to be honest they are more excited over a good golf course versus fake boobies and the smell of other men on their females). The most concerning thing over this situation is him saying "it's all about her"... :puke wrong. It's about the both of them.. and if he allows it to be only all about her he'll be divorced within 5 years.. and I'm being generous there.
October 13, 200421 yr The opposing view. I think however they want their relationship to work is the only thing that is important. Personally, yes I think that sux. But, if he has no problem being bossed around and not standing up for himself, so be it. Besides, no one knows what goes on between them behind closed doors. Maybe he's just selective about the things he puts his foot down about. Maybe a bachelor party wasn't that interesting or important to him in the 1st place and he really wanted to look and feel energized for the big day. My thinking is, I give in to my wife on most of the little things and then I drop the hammer on the big things. For example, 'sure honey let's do the bathroom in all pink and by the way we won't be having any more babies'.
October 13, 200421 yr The midnight curfew is a bit extreme for a Vegas setting. As for the boobis moratorium, insecurities in a spouse/spouse to be are sometimes a reality and it's better to figure out a way to give the reassurance needed and grow that security then to scuttle the relationship because "he/she won't give me the freedom to do what I want." Now, if this is just a tip of the iceberg thing, and a partner has nothing approaching an equal say in the marriage then it's over before they even get off the ground.
October 13, 200421 yr The opposing view. I think however they want their relationship to work is the only thing that is important. Personally, yes I think that sux. But, if he has no problem being bossed around and not standing up for himself, so be it. Besides, no one knows what goes on between them behind closed doors. Maybe he's just selective about the things he puts his foot down about. Maybe a bachelor party wasn't that interesting or important to him in the 1st place and he really wanted to look and feel energized for the big day. My thinking is, I give in to my wife on most of the little things and then I drop the hammer on the big things. For example, 'sure honey let's do the bathroom in all pink and by the way we won't be having any more babies'. Doesn't sound like he was given, or will be given in the near future, the opportunity to compromise (no boobies, be home by midnight, be up by 7... "yes mam!") That is no way to share a life. Apparently they've been together a while if they are getting married (eye.. can you fill in the details a bit?) and maybe he's just a sissy and likes being bossed around like a b**** so maybe they'll be just fine.
October 13, 200421 yr Doesn't sound like he was given, or will be given in the near future, the opportunity to compromise (no boobies, be home by midnight, be up by 7... "yes mam!") That is no way to share a life. Apparently they've been together a while if they are getting married (eye.. can you fill in the details a bit?) and maybe he's just a sissy and likes being bossed around like a b**** so maybe they'll be just fine. Exactly, whatever works for them. Think about how in the old days women used to get punked all the time and didn't complain, divorce was almost unheard of. lol.
October 13, 200421 yr Exactly, whatever works for them. Think about how in the old days women used to get punked all the time and didn't complain, divorce was almost unheard of. lol. Before their were choices or other ways of life..? You can hardly compare the cave man days - or even the 50's - to now. But I kinda see what you were trying to say.
October 13, 200421 yr Before their were choices or other ways of life..? You can hardly compare the cave man days - or even the 50's - to now. But I kinda see what you were trying to say. Ahhh yes the good old days
October 13, 200421 yr Ahhh yes the good old days They're still here...... you just have to creatively reinvent them.
October 13, 200421 yr Author I am curious why they went to Vegas then. I'll be honest, neither Brian or I care too much about going to Vegas, it's not our style, but if you are going to have your wedding in Vegas, is that sort of stuff expected? I posted this right before I left work last night, so I'm going to reply to questions one at a time: It took a while to figure it out why they went to Vegas. I guess she is infatuated with Vegas. She knows all about the history and such. She's been keeping up with the trial of Jack Binion's murder and so on. And during the reception dinner she spoke and said, "Thanks to everyone for making my vision come true."
October 13, 200421 yr I posted this right before I left work last night, so I'm going to reply to questions one at a time: It took a while to figure it out why they went to Vegas. I guess she is infatuated with Vegas. She knows all about the history and such. She's been keeping up with the trial of Jack Binion's murder and so on. And during the reception dinner she spoke and said, "Thanks to everyone for making my vision come true." Hmm.. that's a little creeeepy too. Eye.. what's she like to be around?
October 13, 200421 yr Author The opposing view. I think however they want their relationship to work is the only thing that is important. Personally, yes I think that sux. But, if he has no problem being bossed around and not standing up for himself, so be it. Besides, no one knows what goes on between them behind closed doors. Maybe he's just selective about the things he puts his foot down about. Maybe a bachelor party wasn't that interesting or important to him in the 1st place and he really wanted to look and feel energized for the big day. My thinking is, I give in to my wife on most of the little things and then I drop the hammer on the big things. For example, 'sure honey let's do the bathroom in all pink and by the way we won't be having any more babies'. See, that's the thing. To us, it wasn't about a "Bachelor party" per se. It was more about not seeing him for over 2 years and who knows when again. We just wanted to hang with him for a while. We promised not to go to the strip club. We promised not to get him drunk. We just wanted to see him...for more than 3 hours.
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