I am all kids of messed up

 

I am fine with strangers and crowds of people I do not know.

 

I am really uncomfortable with being with people I know but see infrequently (weddings, Christmas, etc,.) I have an anxiety that there should be a comfort level that is not there after not seeing someone as if it is my fault I have not spoken to this person in 20 years or F' them they have not spoken to me in 20 years. Long lost relatives and what not are horrifying. My wife thinks I am jagoff but it is a thing I guess.

 

This is also the case in social gatherings with 20 or more people where I know them casually but would not consider them friends, something like a school function for my kids.

 

I'm a sociopath, so I handle all the situations the same.

I just fart. Usually a good conversation starter (do you smell something....looks in the circle where I am laughing hysterically).

 

In all seriousness, I think most people have some form of discomfort dealing with new situations (only natural). I am great in an environment where I have a comfort zone with people and when I don't, it all depends (I tend to be an awful conversation starter but if it gets into one of my wheel houses, sports, politics, business, finance, movies, I'm all good). I do tend to insert foot in mouth quite often (which one would think my wife would be used to by now, but evidently she isn't...I try to be more careful around other parents in my kids school for my own kids sake). It also depends on the topic and sometimes I can come off as uncompassionate when people are having a vent / b**** session as I usually don't care and think whatever they are whining about is not worth whining about (but that depends on how well I know the person). Please note, my opinion differs when I think it is actually something that deserves compassion (but oh poor you for working 45 hours, I don't care, deal with it or don't...no one has put a gun to your head or instead of whining about what you can't do or spending all those hours whining instead of just doing something (not all work is going to be fun, just do it so you can get past it and spend more time on whatever you do enjoy).

The problem with your wedding dilemma is smalltalk sucks and is almost painful to do with strangers. Gawd damn I hate meaningless smalltalk.

Tell us how the wedding goes. My guess is it may be totally awful for you at the reception.

 

My suggestion to shipps and others is attack the situation head on and focus totally on the people you have been introduced to. Ask them a question or two, even three. Generally people like talking about themselves. But yes, significant others/spouses do many times have a difficult time at high school reunions of their spouse and weddings where they know nobody. Can be very boring. Helps if you drink and/or have a designated driver so u can get a bit buzzed up, too.

I just fart. Usually a good conversation starter (do you smell something....looks in the circle where I am laughing hysterically).

 

In all seriousness, I think most people have some form of discomfort dealing with new situations (only natural). I am great in an environment where I have a comfort zone with people and when I don't, it all depends. I do tend to insert foot in mouth quite often (which one would think my wife would be used to by now, but evidently she isn't). It also depends on the topic and sometimes I can come off as uncompassionate when people are having a vent / b**** session as I usually don't care and think whatever they are whining about is not worth whining about (but that depends on how well I know the person).

 

It is called an ICE breaker, not an ASS breaker...

It is called an ICE breaker, not an ASS breaker...

LOL....ahhh this made me laugh (been so slammed at work needed a little peaceful time to get off all this stuff and oh man did this make me laugh...thanks Mike).

I am a social butterfly around people I know but at work or many other situations I find myself in extremely uncomfortable situations where I have to connect with people I dont know.

You are pretty normal then. I'd try to relax and focus on the people you are introduced to. Don't talk about yourself until after you've learned about them.

I just fart. Usually a good conversation starter (do you smell something....looks in the circle where I am laughing hysterically).

 

In all seriousness, I think most people have some form of discomfort dealing with new situations (only natural). I am great in an environment where I have a comfort zone with people and when I don't, it all depends (I tend to be an awful conversation starter but if it gets into one of my wheel houses, sports, politics, business, finance, movies, I'm all good). I do tend to insert foot in mouth quite often (which one would think my wife would be used to by now, but evidently she isn't...I try to be more careful around other parents in my kids school for my own kids sake). It also depends on the topic and sometimes I can come off as uncompassionate when people are having a vent / b**** session as I usually don't care and think whatever they are whining about is not worth whining about (but that depends on how well I know the person). Please note, my opinion differs when I think it is actually something that deserves compassion (but oh poor you for working 45 hours, I don't care, deal with it or don't...no one has put a gun to your head or instead of whining about what you can't do or spending all those hours whining instead of just doing something (not all work is going to be fun, just do it so you can get past it and spend more time on whatever you do enjoy).

You should always say, "Is someone popping popcorn?" before you do it. That way, they get a deep breath of it.

I'll chat up anyone anywhere.

 

That's likely awkward in a way too, though!

 

But yeah, not really an issue for me these days.