Play this, then start reading while it goes.

 

Last time we saw our heroes, Jake Peavy out dueled the Twins lone decent starter in Scott Diamond. This was despite the Twins trying to replicate the dome experience by having Span reach via error, only for Mauer to pop out, and trying to rally in the ninth.

 

So, let's get to today's matchup.

 

In this corner...

 

 

Philiiiiiiiiiiiiiip Huuuuuuuuuuuuumber.

 

5-5, 5.90 ERA for the man with the White Sox second perfect game in the past few years.

 

VS.

 

THIS b****

 

 

Fun fact: Greinke hates pitching at the Cell.

 

Whimp.

 

 

SOX SHOWED THE TWINS WHY A NEW NON-DOMED STADIUM WAS A MISTAKE.

 

SHALL THEY CONTINUE WITH THEIR WINNING WAYS?

 

AND DEFEAT THE TEAM THAT WAS SO BAD THEY NEEDED A MOVIE ABOUT DIVINE BEINGS NEEDED TO HELP THEM WIN?

 

THEN BASK IN THE GLORY OF SWEET, SUCCULENT VICTORY?

 

YES.

 

BECAUSE f*** ALL THE HATERS.

 

THIS.

 

IS.

 

WHITE SOX.

 

BASEBALL.

 

AND NOW, FOR YOUR CHICAGO WHITE SOX.

 

 

LINEUPS TO BE ANNOUNCED.

 

 

ALEJANDRO DE AZA - CF

 

 

KEVIN "GREEK GOD OF WALKS" YOUKILIS - 3B

 

ADAM "BIG'UN" DUNN - DH

 

 

PAUL "THE PROFESSOR" KONERKO - 1B

 

 

ALEX RIOS - RF

 

 

 

AJ PIERZYNSKI - C

Angels fans love AJ.

 

 

DAYAN "THE TANK" VICIEDO - LF

Dayan is friend to all.

 

 

ALEXEI "THE CUBAN MISSILE" RAMIREZ - SS

 

 

 

GORDON "BACON SLAYER" BECKHAM - 2B

 

Edited August 3, 201213 yr by Quinarvy

The classic matchup of the two second teams in their respective cities. BEAT THOSE ANGELS!

Humber vs Greinke looks bad on paper, but the Angels played a long, deflating game yesterday so we can hope that their arms are tired.

Oh and your threads are easily the most entertaining. :

Fun fact: Kyyle messaged me to get this up while I was getting it up.

 

Now back to sleep.

Since I cut the cord earlier this year, I can't watch any of these games at home haha. I'll have to go to a friends or a bar to watch any of this series...

My favorite tweet of the last month: Does it bother anyone that the Angela full name literally translates to "The The Angels Angels"?

Ugh, Greinke is so good.

My friend has that Adam Dunn bobblehead. It's pretty great.

Fun fact: Kyyle messaged me to get this up while I was getting it up.

So you were masturbating.

Edited August 3, 201213 yr by Steve9347

So you were masturbating.

 

well that just became a not so fun fact

Grienke can be beaten and we can do it

well that just became a not so fun fact

 

[in Hawk voice] Y'know Stone Pony, no one could masturbate like Yaz.

[in Hawk voice] Y'know Stone Pony, no one could masturbate like Yaz.

There's a birth control joke in there somewhere.

So you were masturbating.

 

Great minds think alike.

My favorite tweet of the last month: Does it bother anyone that the Angela full name literally translates to "The The Angels Angels"?

 

If you have to say it twice, it probably wasn't worth hearing once.

THUNDERSTRUCK!!!

 

ITS ALL GOOD!!!

Can we get 11 games up please?

Ugh, Greinke is so good.

Career at USCF:

 

2 Wins

7 Losses

5.49 ERA

.815 OPS

Phil. Her. Up.

So you were masturbating.

 

Well f*** me for just waking up to post this. Too tired to realize I posted a double entendre.

BOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

Anibal Sanchez gets out of hot water in the top of the 1st.

 

Cmon MASTERSON!!!

Tigers up 1-0 through 2 on some horrible d by the Tribe.

Edited August 3, 201213 yr by Noonskadoodle

Indians look really bad. No one on their team hitting over .300 since the ASB.