My two year old daughter pretty much tells me NO! No matter what I say to her or ask her. Not sure if she is just trying to be mean to me or if she says no because she doesn't know what the hell I am talking about? For instance I will ask her if she wants to go home while we are riding in the car coming home after work and she says NO! and will then go onto add that I WANNA GO HOME DADDY! Then I think to myself...what the hell did I just ask?

 

Anyways I know you guys have funny stories of your kids.

Oh and I realize the posters without kids will definitely not give a crap about our kids stories.

My daughter is doing that too Jeff. We read a book where the response to everything is a kid saying "no" and then eventually the kid learns to change how it is asked to care more about the other person. For about a week, no matter what I asked my daughter, she thought she was playing along with the book and would say..No, No, No.

 

Do you want ice cream? No

Do you want to go to the park? No

Do you want a graham cracker? No

Do you want a vitamin (basically a gummy bear)? No

 

I would find it all comical cause the above 3 things are basically her favorite 3 things in the world. With the 1st the one she almost never gets and the other three things that we do with her every day. I don't think I ever thought I'd turn into as patient of a parent as I am (given how impatient I am in general). Hopefully I stay that way.

Baby is only 3 weeks old. So he pees on his head occasionally. I'm a little impressed.

Baby is only 3 weeks old. So he pees on his head occasionally. I'm a little impressed.

 

Notify us when he does something that shipps can't

Lots of babbling and blowing bubbles. We have the most adorable baby ever. I guess the hotness of my wife helped.

just some babbling and smiles as of now (2.5 months) and he sure can rip a good fart

my sons are assholes. I love them so much, but goddamn

My 2-year old can sing "Let It Go" from memory. Come to think of it, so can I now because I've heard the song 38,439 times.

My daughter is almost 2 and has a crazy vocabulary.

 

"I need fix my head", grabs white sox hat, "all better".

 

 

If anyone has kids that watch "Teen Titans Go", my kids sing the Pie song. ALL. THE. TIME.

This conversation actually happened at our house one time when our youngest daughter came in with mud on her for whatever reason.

 

Wife (talking to youngest daughter): Look at you, you've got mud on your face.

oldest daughter: You big disgrace

me: kicking your can all over the place.

 

Oldest daughter and I high-fived while my wife gave us a dirty look.

 

 

Another time my middle daughter was talking about a ceramic cat that she saw at a garage sale. She said something like "I want to buy it and paint it black."

 

I was like "Ok Mick Jagger." While she gave me a confused look my oldest starting singing (to the tune of Paint it Black) "I found a ceramic kitty and I want it painted black."

 

I was all:

 

It's awesome when a teenage girl knows the lyrics to classic songs that were released before *I* was born.

 

I knew this thread would make me laugh.

Riding in the car with my two girls down 355, we passed a hearse....

 

Youngest: "Look dad....a limo"

 

Me: "No, that's a hearse not a limo"

 

Youngest: " Hearse, Limo what's the difference"

 

Oldest: "the person in the back"

 

I almost had to pull over from laughing so hard.

 

At my inlaws for dinner my Father in law old wooden chair broke sending him to the floor hard. My MIL looked over from the kitchen and asked "What happened?"

my youngest (11 at the time) said "Gravity happened"

 

and milk came out my nose.........

 

I'll be chiming in on this in a week or two when the first grandbaby is born.

 

My kids are boring now. All they want to do is take me to bars and shows.

 

And those changing boys, you need a supply of these

 

http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywo...sl_8q3ubslohl_b

Riding in the car with my two girls down 355, we passed a hearse....

 

Youngest: "Look dad....a limo"

 

Me: "No, that's a hearse not a limo"

 

Youngest: " Hearse, Limo what's the difference"

 

Oldest: "the person in the back"

 

I almost had to pull over from laughing so hard.

 

At my inlaws for dinner my Father in law old wooden chair broke sending him to the floor hard. My MIL looked over from the kitchen and asked "What happened?"

my youngest (11 at the time) said "Gravity happened"

 

and milk came out my nose.........

Haha.

 

You know for years as a kid, I actually thought Frank Thomas nickname was the Big Hearst (vs. big hurt). I thought it was because he "killed" the ball. When I found out it was the big hurt, I was disappointed because I always thought my nickname was more badass.