March 15, 201115 yr (Wasn't sure which forum to place this in. It's an off the wall topic, but yet it's still baseball related. If it needs to be moved to The SLAM, please do so) Anyway, couldn't sleep worth a "dink" tonight, so I thought that since I was up and reading threads, that I would start one that was similar to one I did a few years ago. The idea is to take any baseball players name (past or present) and fit it into a sentence or quote to "punnerize" it (if there is such a word!!!) Since the last one was a few years ago, a lot have players have come and gone, and a lot more Soxtalk mermbers came on board, so let's see where we go with this. Here's a few to get started. I don't think that Jorge can do that! Oh yes! Jorge Cantu!!! Does he drink beer, or does Harmon Killebrew? If Roy Rogers wife is soaking wet, and Don Johnson towels her down, is that the same thing as saying that Don Drysdale? If he wants to slide down the staircase railing that's fine, after all it is Floyd's Bannister! There, you get the point! Yeah...it's pretty corny, but it makes your mind think in a "warped" fashion! Let's DIG for some REALLY clever ones. And Oh....no cheating by going back to the old version of this thread for ideas!!!
March 15, 201115 yr See that couple on the beach by the facsimili machine ... That's right, it's Sandy Koufax The burglar has made his way down the California coast and now he's Robin Ventura.
March 15, 201115 yr I had a mechanical penis installed, but I knocked it loose during an intense "session", so now I need a Dick Allen wrench.
March 15, 201115 yr QUOTE (Rooftop Shots @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 04:13 AM) I don't think that Jorge can do that! Oh yes! Jorge Cantu!!! Nancy Faust already claimed this one by playing "Anything you cantu I cantu better" when he walked to the plate.
March 15, 201115 yr My Gillette Mach 3 is getting old and dull. I remember first purchasing it and saying "Damn that Razor Shines!"
March 15, 201115 yr I got some deer-lined jackets for Christmas last year - man, do I love those Buck Coates!!
March 15, 201115 yr Author QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 01:04 PM) So that chick smelled kinda funny, turns out she had a Rusty... Oh nevermind. Yikes! I guess that "Oh Nevermind" was the correct response! As we now move on with. Need a good Chiropractor? Try Wally's Backman!
March 15, 201115 yr When asked by the arresting office why he had a gun to the buck's head, the assailant claimed that he liked to Rob Deer.
March 15, 201115 yr QUOTE (southsider2k5 @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 01:04 PM) So that chick smelled kinda funny, turns out she had a Rusty... Oh nevermind. Sometimes, when I’m feeling a bit randy and naughty, I like to put on a trenchcoat, get my Garth Iorg, and then find a crowded street corner where I can Rance Mulliniks right there in public, with no one even knowing! . . . . or have I misapprehended the purpose of this thread?
March 16, 201115 yr Author If he keeps growing, will Grady Sizemore??? When you are in Texas, which Huston Street would you like to drive on? Bummer, I didn't get anything to eat. All I wanted was for Mark Teixeira slice of pizza with me.
March 16, 201115 yr Author QUOTE (knightni @ Mar 15, 2011 -> 09:38 PM) That round lobby roof annoys me Kosuke, Fukudome! clever
March 16, 201115 yr To rid the town of vampires you must Chuck Knoblauch at them. Edited March 16, 201115 yr by ptatc
March 16, 201115 yr Went to a strip club with a buddy and there was one lady whose outstanding assets caught his eye. He eventually had to have a lap dance from her. So while I was watching this, I could see the those assets were drawing his focus. I, forgetting the no touch rule encouraged him with "Go ahead Jim, Palmer."
March 16, 201115 yr Author Wanted to visit a friend in Indiana. Couldn't which town he lived in. Let's see...St. John? No Valparaiso?? No. Hey Michael, Cuddyer Indiana be the correct town? Man, there are just too many dead people to be able to have all of these funerals at once. For loved ones to be able to view the bodies beforehand, maybe we ought to go outside and use Tim's Wakefield!
March 16, 201115 yr QUOTE (knightni @ Mar 16, 2011 -> 12:02 PM) Kevin, Youkilis with your funny jokes!
March 16, 201115 yr I really thought I was a hillbilly piece of garbage who couldn't do anything right, but Adam Dunn f***ed up this time!
March 16, 201115 yr I don't know amigo, I wanted two docks for my fishing boats, but I guess I'll have to deal with Juan Pierre. (hispanic accent)
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