Chicago White Sox

Eloy might die playing first base. Honestly no hope when he gets injured running the bases.

Anything short of a 3 months injury and I will be shocked

I know when my hammy is sore I make my wife push me around in a wheelchair

Burger / Sheets platoon at DH when Moncada comes back.

What a fucking disaster.

He’s on ?

Squeze is heating up

Hopefully JR told Tony to cut that shit out

The reverse psychology worked to some extent! Vaughn batting 2nd is huge.

What’s the speculation?

Wow

Vaughn, Mendick, Tim, Pollock, & Burger?

Unfortunately probably yes

I don’t know what any of these words mean

Cancel my plans to move back to Chicago

Alright, for real this time, we need to stop fucking around and win some ball games. I’m sick and tired of fucking losing to mediocre clubs like the Indians & Twins. Today isn’t going to be easy with Velasquez on the mound. For those who dislike the color blue, I’d advise not looking at Vince’s Statcast page. I’d love to make a case for the dude today, but there simply isn’t one to make. We have to assume he gives up three or four in five innings and plan our lineup accordingly to overcome that. So to start, no B squad dudes in the lineup. I need all my core guys who are healthy in there today. That means Abreu at 1B, Tim at SS, Grandal at C, Vaughn in LF, Eloy at DH, and Pollock in RF. And as much as I’d love to fit Sheets in there somewhere, we can’t completely sacrifice OF defense with Velasquez on the mound. As such, that means Engel gets the start CF in today. To add some power potential I’m going with Burger at 3B. And since death is not an option, I see no choice but go with Legend at 2B (curse you Hahn for it having to come to this). In terms of sequencing, here’s how I’d arrange the lineup. Anderson, SS Pollock, RF Abreu, 1B Grandal, C# Jimenez, DH Vaughn, LF Burger, 3B Engel, CF Garcia, 2B# I think that lineup gets you five today. With Velasquez likely giving up three or four as mentioned above we got to hope the bullpen can give us four quality innings. That will be even more challenging with Graveman likely out pocket. Just gotta hope that some combo of Lopez & Ruiz can get you to Bummer & Hendriks. Would be nice to have Kelly right about now, but unfortunately when Hahn talked about prioritizing pitching he wasn’t really concerned with the first month of the season for some reason. Execute the plan as outlined above and I think we win 5-4. If Tony continues fuck around and set the lineup after a few too many Goose & water’s well then god help us all. Either way, let’s fucking go!

?

I guarantee we win today.

Time to stop fucking around and end this losing streak. Here’s how I approach to today’s game if I’m Tony. First, you must acknowledge that Bundy is both tough & RHP. As such, I’m stacking the lineup with all my left-handed bats. That means Legend, Sheets, Haseley, Grandal, & McGuire all must play. Jose & Tim are vets so they get starts. Eloy had that big hit in the 9th so he gets a start. And hopefully Harrison is ready to go, because I need that Big Energy at the bottom of the lineup. Now setting the lineup gets a bit tricky with so many studs, but you got break up all those righties. Anderson, SS Legend, 3B# Abreu, 1B Grandal, DH# Jimenez, LF Sheets, RF* McGuire, C* Harrison, 2B Haseley, CF* Damn that lineup looks as sweet as a fresh bottle of Goose. Table setters at the top and bottom and plenty of boppers in those #3 to #6 spots. It’s well balanced too with just the right mix of vets & youth. Definitely don’t want them young’uns to have to carry the load against a tough veteran pitcher. Defense in the OF corners might be a little below average, but with Squeze on the mound today I’m not too concerned. He’s been working hard with Katzy and I think he’s ready to pop. I fully expect six from him today, but Severino should be ready to give two or three innings as well if need be. I like that kid’s arm and he just needs the innings to breakout. Overall I feel real good about what the arms are going to give us today. We’re lucky that Hahn prioritized pitching coming out the lockout and got us an extra fire baller in Squeze. He’s exactly the type of veteran pitcher we need to bust the slump we’re in in. Let’s fucking go!

Save us Jake Burger…you’re are only hope

Good stay Eloy!!

You’re selling him at low point. His swing may be a mess right, but he’s more likely to fix it than not and immensely increase his value.

Lol…you crazy bro

I absolutely despise Tony La Russa

They’re better than what they’re showing, but we’re definitely going to get exploited against tough righties. Pretending that Leury is somehow better against RHP than our actual good hitters doesn’t help.