Controlled Chaos

QUOTE(LVSoxFan @ Oct 5, 2006 -> 04:36 PM) ED NOTE: THIS IS TONGUE-IN-CHEEK FOR LAUGHS. I DON'T MIND HAWK AT ALL. Roeper wrote about how Hawk needs to dump all the tired cliches when he's doing Sox broadcasts, and then listed them. I thought I/we should join on the fun. Here was my reply: Anyway, you were right on today about how the Hawkster needs to retire his now-tiresome cliches, not only because they ARE cliches, but also because they announce to the world: "Yes, I am considerably that much older than most of you. And I was obviously a redneck. Ergo I am tone-deaf to Generation X, Y, Z and everything after!" I think we can all agree that we will never tire of "You can put it on the booooooooooard, YES!" My all-time favorite home run call. That stays. Unless he wants to make it: "You can put it on my myspace paaaaaaaage.... YES!" Nah. That's not gonna work. Let's deal with the others: "Can o' corn": I had to have a co-worker explain what this meant to me. When I heard that explanation, my reply was: "Are you ***ing kidding me?" The Hawkeroo needs to realize that most of us didn't grow up going to the general store in town like he did, where the Prepperidge Farm guy pulled down a can with a long stick of a high shelf. We were waiting in line for a "PRICE CHECK!" because the UPC code smudged and the scanner wouldn't read it. REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: For an easy pop-up, the Hawk should say "And... for making [insert player's salary here], he'd better ****ing catch that! We'll be right back!" "Suck 'em up, Joe": Is at Crede at third base or facing a line of shots on the bar a Hooters? This is lame. REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: Nothing. Just shut up, Hawk. "Rack 'em up": Rack what up? Is this when the inning's over? Is this a bowling analogy, or billiards? REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: How about: "The inning's over." Nobody likes being analogied to death. "He JUST missed it": This is what Hawk says about any ball that's, like, within 10 feet of the warning track even if the wind is blowing directly in from center at 30 MPH. This, along with "STRETCH," has been used so many times for balls that were EASILY fielded I don't even look up from my betting form when he blurts it out. Er, hey! I was just kiddin! "Grab some bench": I personally don't mind this one, and enjoy it as a taunt. But what if the guy just goes and stands in the dugout, without sitting down? These are the questions people are afraid to ask. "He gone!": aside from being grammatically unfortunate, there's an interesting contradiction here if you go to games at the park, where when they play it on the loudspeaker it's actually "He's gone." I never got that. REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: Forget it. This one's never going away. Once it's on a t-shirt at the Cell, it's permanent. Just like my "BORCHARD RULES!" shirt. Right? "Big crooked number:" what the hell does this even mean? "Crooked number"? Does that mean "odd" number? Integer? What? What's crooked about it? Is the scoreboard askew? REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: Just tell us the score and let's get to the unavoidable U.S. Cellular commercial already. "Cinch it up and hunker down": this sounds like a command given to prisoners at Abu Ghraib, and you we're not going to even go there... REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: Sometimes it's better to just say nothing, if this is the best you can come up with. Yuck. "Be a two-strike hitter, 24": Can we all agree as Sox fans that at any given pitch we want you to hit the ball? So not only is this command redundant and stating the obvious, it's unnecessary, because... REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: ...you're the broadcaster, Hawk. Let us do the cheering if this is the best you can come up with. Because "Duh!" insights like this are a dime a dozen, and nobody likes the guy who decided to supply the dime... "Chopper two-hopper": "Caught by the big bopper, who's got the runner by a whopper, and he nails him! PROPA!" File under: self-explanatory REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: More like "deletion suggestion." This is the baseball equivalent of "You gellin?" "Right size, wrong shape": Huh? What kind of non-sequitir crap is this? It was a foul ball. Seeing that it was out of play there was nothing "right" about the size OR the shape REPLACEMENT SUGGESTIONS: Instant bet between him and D.J.if the person who catches it has a mustache. Make it a drinking game. "This ballgame is OVA": This is one of those weird Hawk-isms where he appears to be appropriating slang from some other subculture, but nobody knows what it is. Is it Southern? Italian? Urban slang? Just something he thought of and thought was funny? Ambiguity: it's a b****! REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: If we lose: "F*ck! What is this, 2006?" If they win: "Hey Twins: put THIS in your inflatable dome and..." Think about that. Yuck! "The Carmines": what, is it 1957 already? Nobody under the age of sixty knows why you call them this. Ergo, stop calling them this. REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: For accuracy purposes, call them "ESPN's Man-Crush" "The Twinkies": Hey, welcome to sixth grade! Here's your desk! REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION: "The team that's always up our ass." Hope this helps, Rich. I'll post these at soxtalk.com so we can get a movement going! A+ for effort here LV. It looks like you put a lot of time into this post. Next time, however, I would urge you to follow your own advice. See REPLACEMENT SUGGESTION for "cinch it up and hunker down" Serious question....Are they cliches if you're the one that came up with them?? Can something be cliche if you're the only that does it?

Inmates running the asylum!! haha Seriously though, I don't see too many threads that were closed.

QUOTE(jackie hayes @ Oct 4, 2006 -> 01:17 AM) I wouldn't scare people off the Sox Pride thing. I joined just to get the online radio, and it's $5 cheaper than the usual subscription, so, at least for this year, I think it was worth it. That's saying nothing about the tix, I never used that. Yeah, I also joined for the radio, but I did receive the code to purchase tickets. I also saw on a sox pride message board that some people bought tickets for the sox cubs game with that code and I thought it was sold out for months. So I don't how much of a scam it was...I don't think they made any promises that they didn't come through on...it was just a little promo...take it or leave it.

I never been to a funeral with music. So is it pumpin in the funeral home or do you like pass out CD's to people so they can listen during the procession. I think I'll pass out CD's....here goes..... Dead Mans Party - Oingo Boingo Buried Myself Alive - The Used Don't Forget Me When I'm Gone - Glass Tiger Fly me to the Moon - Frank Sinatra Alone Again - Dokken Only the Good Die Young - Billy Joel (omit after 65) Superman is Dead - Our Lady of Peace (haha) Silent Lucidity _Queensryche It's The End Of The World As We Know It - REM (I'm not conceded or anything) Fly to the Angels - Slaughter Feel the Pain - Dinosaur Jr Nice To Know You - Incubus Seein Red - Unwritten Law Kiss Me Deadly - Lita Ford Send the Pain Below - Chevelle Tears May Fall - TKA ( oh yeah...I went there) Heaven - Warrant Roll Me Away - Bob Seger Elevation - U2 Don't Fear The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult (bring it Reaper!!) Don't You Forget About Me- Simple Minds

Check this thread for some talk about Crede.

Yeah this rebuttle from the players and coop stems from this article (relevant excerpt posted below) where DeLuca states theres a rift. I have to say when I read this article it's the first I had ever heard of any problems between AJ, Garland or Cooper. Things like that aren't usually kept quite. DON'T DEAL CREDE OR A.J. The emergence of prospect Josh Fields has turned up the heat on the talk of trading Joe Crede to avoid a showdown the following offseason with agent Scott Boras. Despite a bad back, Crede had a career year. His defense is too valuable, and his offense is living up to its lofty expectations. There also have been rumors throughout baseball that catcher A.J. Pierzynski could be trade bait. The Sox have no other options behind the plate and won't find another catcher with similar hitting skills. Pierzynski needs to patch up a strained relationship with pitching coach Don Cooper and emerging ace Jon Garland.

QUOTE(Flash Tizzle @ Sep 28, 2006 -> 10:48 AM) It seems with all Williams positive traits, he doesn't know the damn thing about trading players at their peak value. I'm not merely suggesting this due to Buehrle's troubles. I've stated before it was ridiculous (IMO) that not one starter was delt after the World Series. Any reasonable person would have guessed their collective statistics would likely regress; and if it didn't, they were going to command a higher salary the following season. What made it even more difficult to comprehend is f***ing Brandon McCarthy was available to replace whomever was traded. AND Vazquez was acquired. It honestly made too much sense not to trade a WS starter. Our bullpen was noticeably weak -- trading one could have replenished that part of our team as well. How many games has the bullpen cost us? Or an entire season without McCarthy? I can't say these moves would have been the difference between our current standings and a playoff birth, but I believe we'd be better off than our current situation. If we would have traded one of our big 4 starters after the world series last year, I would have thought THAT was ridiculous. We were trying to repeat and I wanted nothing less than our big 4 while doing it. Real GM's don't have the benefit of hindsight. Kenny kept the core together. You say "not one" as if you would have liked him to trade away even more than that. I'm glad you're posting on a white sox message board and have no affiliation with the team whatsoever.

QUOTE(BHAMBARONS @ Sep 27, 2006 -> 11:40 AM) You’re right on. Here in Zona there are only 3 ways to officially die. 1. Nat Causes, 2. Accident, 3 Homicide. The code of Arizona considers suicide as a self inflicted homicide which means if you attempt it you can be brought up on charges but the state uses it to make sure the victim gets help rather than throw them into jail. So you can like get arrested for attempted murder on yourself? If that's the case then youshould to take precautions to get the job done right!

QUOTE(SoxHawk1980 @ Sep 22, 2006 -> 02:09 PM) Really? Name one. The sox winning the world series last year.

QUOTE(Pierzynski_12 @ Sep 22, 2006 -> 08:25 AM) AJ's homerun in the top of the 9th against the cubs with 2 outs and 2 on! That has to be my favoirte and I know I'm not alone on that one. I was there....It's definitely one of my highlights this year.

Baseball is a job of acceptable failures. A job where, on a good year, you only fail about 65-70% of the time. Try to equate that to your life. Imagine trying your hardest at something and failing 70% of the time. How would you react? Actually, there's a lot more ups and downs than that in baseball cause you can do your best and still fail 100% of the time on any given night. Not because of a lack of desire or effort, but because of an inch. One inch can be the difference between success and failure on every swing....every pitch. Try to understand the mental exhaustion in that and then imagine not being able to get frustrated about it. Frustration will only make you worse and the same goes for trying harder. In this game you have to stay on an even keel, have confidence in yourself and accept failure. It goes pretty much against all life has taught us. It's against human nature to accept failure, but if a player, god forbid, doesn't run out his ground ball to second completing his 0-4, 100% failure of a night, he's a quitter for not hustling. They're millionaires, but they are human. It has to be pretty dam frustrating to totally suck at your job on any given night let alone a few nights in a row. Most players do act somewhat inhuman in dealing with it, but it catches up to everybody from time to time. The way you or I get frustrated just watching the game, I'd love to see how we would handle that much failure in our own lives. When the chips are down like they are now...everyone is trying a little harder and everyone is letting the frustration creep in just a little bit more than usual and you know what most "fans" think about that..... "This team sucks, they quit, they gave up" What a Joke!!! Every player is trying to get the big hit or make the big pitch or the big play. They may get frustrated and pissed off when they don't, but it takes a lot of arrogance to question their heart and effort unless you're in that clubhouse. Now if we have guys that are just out there to collect a paycheck then I'd be pissed off, but I haven't seen any indications of that and I'm not sure how some here can make those accusations without the slightest bit of evidence. You can't attribute 0-fers to lack of heart or effort...if anything it's from over effort. I'm not feeling sorry for the players here. They are millionaires playing baseball for a living, but I understand the game. I understand what they're doing out there. There is no switch you turn on and off. The game is about inches and sometimes you're right on and get it done and sometimes you're off by an inch and you don't. That is baseball. Love it or leave it.

QUOTE(pcullotta @ Sep 21, 2006 -> 08:06 AM) It is true that BA's average climbed extremely well in the second half but it is also true that Ozzie did not play BA against a lot of tough pitchers (especially tough right handers). I wonder if his average would have continued climbing at that pace if he had to face all of the pitchers Ozzie protected him from. This is also why we had to put up with Mack in CF for all those games. Everyone yelled "why is Mack out there when BA is hitting .300 this month" but no one wanted to mention that BA was doing it against pitchers Ozzie thought would be easier for him. Of course no one will ever know what BA could have done against those tough pitchers but I just wanted to throw that out there. Easy pitchers such as, Shilling, Rogers, Mussina, Zumaya, Ryan, Farnsworth, Robertson, Zito, Johnson....

wow cracked him right in half!!

We won 9 in a row from 6/15-6/24. 10 would be nice, but 9 would put enough fear into the tiggers to collapse.

QUOTE(RockRaines @ Sep 20, 2006 -> 09:39 AM) You dont just go and trade your Ace of the last 4 years because he had a down year. Thats ridiculous. I'd say about 85% of the posts around here lately are ridiculous. You would think people passionate enough to post on a baseball site would know a little bit about baseball, but time and time again we see it's not the case. Thanks for bringing some sense to the site Rock.

Ketchup for me too!!!

QUOTE(Flash Tizzle @ Sep 18, 2006 -> 03:22 PM) YAY, another round of Rogers no-hitting our offense through 4 innings. since we're making baseless predictions, I think Rogers is gone by the 4th inning

My biggest beef with Ozzie has been Mack in center. It's not his position...I know it, he knows it, the whole world knows it. When Mack makes comments like below, you wonder if he is telling Ozzie...Hey, I appreciate the playing time, but this is not my position and I'm hurting the team by being here. Mack isn't a fool and he's pretty much taking one for the team so to speak. Ozzie has put him in this position and I applaud him for taking on the challenge even though it makes him look like an idiot at times. I just read today where Ozzie said he starters will start every game from here on out?? I wonder who his starting CF is? I don't like playing manager and questioning every pitching decision or whatever...Players have a way of making a manager look really bad or really good. Every manager is questioned for their in game decisions, but this is not an in game decision. It says Ozzie thought this over and this is what he's doing. It says the whole world is wrong and I'm right. It makes you wonder if Ozzie has any clue about Andersons second half. Does he even know he has better offensive numbers than Mack? The last few times I've heard Ozzie talk about Brian it's as if he's still looking at his first half numbers. http://www.suntimes.com/output/sox/cst-spt-soxnt16.html Ozzie likes Mackowiak in center September 16, 2006 BY JOE COWLEY Staff Reporter Advertisement OAKLAND, Calif. --Rob Mackowiak started in center field for the third time in the last four games on Friday night, as Guillen obviously has shown which player he is most confident with in crunch time. And it isn't Brian Anderson. ''Right now we have to put the best lineup [on the field],'' Guillen said. ''It's a must-win thing and not just play the game.'' Mackowiak rewarded the move with a solo home run in the third inning off Esteban Loaiza. Mackowiak said he's surprised he's been used as much as he has been, but definitely wasn't going to complain. ''I think I've been a little surprised because I haven't played the greatest defense, and you have to have your best out there at this time of the year, especially center field,'' Mackowiak said. ''I guess we need offense in there too right now.''

First off I'm pretty much in line with most others here that think it's just a superstition, but even so, I was always under the impression that you couldn't mention it to the pitcher. I didn't know nobody could talk about it. What the heck do two schmoos that have nothing to do with the game have to be silent for??

I wasn't aware broadcasters couldn't talk about it. I never heard of that. Can we as fans mention it? Should we post about it? IMO Jay is really stretching here. Jay Mariotti Nothing perfect about this game call September 14, 2006 BY JAY MARIOTTI SUN-TIMES COLUMNIST So there was Freddy Garcia, crusty cap and all, repairing to the White Sox' dugout after retiring the first 21 Angels hitters Wednesday in Anaheim. And there was Hawk Harrelson, trembling in the TV booth like a human California earthquake, committing the ultimate sin in any baseball superstition handbook. ''PERFECT THROUGH SEVEN!'' he barked. It's difficult enough tolerating this man's savage butchering of the language, which should be accompanied by subtitles and a ruler-wielding English teacher. But to hear him violate the traditional code that comes with any no-hit bid -- never, ever mention the p-word or the n-word during a broadcast -- basically jinxed any chance of Garcia completing the rare deed. Same goes for a large WGN graphic posted in the top of the eighth inning, which blared this to an afternoon drive-time audience in Chicago: ''PERFECT GAME IN PROGRESS.'' Of course, Garcia lost his flirtation with perfection in the eighth, only magnifying the decision by Harrelson and the production crew to blurt out the news flash. Why not be cleverly subdued like other broadcast crews in similar situations? Wasn't the linescore enough of an informative guide -- ANGELS 0 0 0 -- to prevent Harrelson from shouting out the obvious after the seventh? Down in the Sox dugout, no one dared to mention Garcia's pursuit of history, with 24-year-old Brian Anderson wise enough to say: ''Obviously people weren't talking about it because that's not a good thing.'' But no one told Hawkeroo, the baseball lifer with the stale 1960s shop stories. And no one told WGN, which may have been prioritizing an unexpected quickie ratings grab over a long-running baseball man law. We don't see many no-hitters in this town, with Wilson Alvarez last recording one for the Sox in 1991. Couldn't Harrelson have taken deep breaths and restrained his innards for two more innings? All of which happened on an eventful day and night that finally might have allowed the Sox' stumblebum second half to reverse field, though I emphasize ''might'' much as a meteorologist would. Before the shockingly dominant 9-0 victory by Garcia, who has acknowledged he likely will be pitching elsewhere next year, the Sox' teetering cause was enhanced by news from Minnesota that Francisco Liriano will be shut down after re-injuring his elbow in a loss to Oakland. If Liriano had returned to good health and combined forces with MVP candidate Johan Santana, who has become the biggest lock in sports beyond Tiger Woods, the Twins not only would have caught the Detroit Tigers for the division title, but also might have won the American League pennant. In any postseason series, wouldn't you like a club that went 37-9 in games involving its two aces? But Liriano might be looking at Tommy John surgery, which removes an imposing obstacle from the Sox' stretch run and makes a season-ending series at the Metrodome a little more negotiable. Starting rotation encouraging Later, the Tigers and erratic rookie Justin Verlander were pummeled by the Texas Rangers, meaning the Sox are three games behind Detroit and only 1-1/2 behind the Twins. Don't count me among those believing this is necessarily the start of a Sox rampage, knowing they've played mediocre-to-lousy baseball the last two months. I still see problems with Bobby Jenks' health -- as Shakira says, the hips don't lie -- along with other bullpen members and two outfielders, Scott Podsednik and Anderson, who already have been told by a finger-pointing, don't-blame-me Ozzie Guillen that they'll probably be replaced next year. I also don't grasp the horrible timing of talk that Joe Crede, now an elite third baseman, might be dealt because Ken Williams would rather swim with stingrays than do business with Jerry Reinsdorf's favorite agent, Scott Boras. But it should be noted the starting rotation, a death march much of the season, has shown encouraging signs of late. Maybe, just maybe, Garcia, Jose Contreras and Mark Buehrle can join Jon Garland in forming a formidable playoff rotation. They have to get there first, I realize, and standing in the way starting Friday is old friend Frank Thomas, who would love to bury their season and push his team toward an AL West title. Should the Sox end the weekend within three games of the Tigers, they can catch them during a three-game series against Detroit starting Monday on the South Side. Officially, the Tigers are choking, with only Kenny Rogers pitching consistently in the rotation, too many big hitters wheezing and striking out (Magglio Ordonez included) and injuries diluting their bullpen. That said, the Sox still haven't played the kind of steady baseball that can overtake the Tigers. One can only hope they'll be better under pressure than Harrelson. Did he miss the memos about how to handle no-no bids? The golden rule is to hint, not blurt, and the forerunner was Hall of Famer Bob Wolff back in the 1956 World Series. Remember how he handled Don Larsen's perfect-game call as the ninth inning started? ''Yankees lead with a two-nothing score with the only five hits in the game,'' he said. ''But that score is just half of this tremendous ballgame going on today.'' Everyone else seems to know Another great, Mel Allen, handled Dave Righetti's no-hitter with similar restraint in 1983. ''There have been five hits in this ballgame, for those who have turned in late, and the Yankees have had 'em all,'' he said. The subtlety has carried into most booths in the 21st century, with announcers reporting the facts without emotion, as Cubs radio man Pat Hughes did when Carlos Zambrano flirted with a no-no in June. Last season, when Glendon Rusch took a perfect game into the seventh, Cubs broadcasters Len Kasper and Bob Brenly were careful not to state the obvious. Even an old sportscaster named Ronald Reagan knew. ''When I'd be calling a game in which a pitcher has not given up a hit and you're getting [into] the sixth or seventh, I never mentioned it,'' he once said. ''Because there's an old superstition that if anyone mentions he's pitching a no-hitter, you'll jinx him and he won't pitch the no-hitter.'' Hawkeroo? ''PERFECT THROUGH SEVEN!'' Next time, I'm bringing duct tape.

nice pauly!!

yeah baby!!

How's this Napoli catcher?? How about a double steal? of course lets see if the guy can throw a pitch over the plate