One day a guy was out in the woods taking a pee, when suddenly a rattlesnake came out of the bushes and bit him on his dick. He gave a loud yell, and his friend came running to his side.
"What has happened?"
"A snake bit me on my dick, you're going to have to go find a doctor and ask what to do."
The friend leaves the guy to find help. Soon he came upon a town, and found the local doctor.
"Help! my friend has been bitten by a rattlesnake! What should I do?"
The doctor replied: "Well, you will have to suck the poison from the wound, then bandage it up."
"Thank you doctor!" the friend replied while running back out the door. He ran for a while until he found his friend who was bitten, lying on the ground.
"Well, what did he say?" asked the victim.
His friend looked at the wound, and then looked at him and said, "He said you're gonna die."