The Critic

I was thinking the EXACT same thing...and if it wasn't KW it would be someone else. There has to be some kind of curse on the Sox when it comes to big trades or free agents - it just never seems to work out long-term...

Hey, MPS, I need directions again to "Maury's House Of Fun!" It's been a while since I've been out that way. E-mail them to me, f***tard!!

"Awwwwwwwwww, Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!" "Dude, that's not even FAIR, hey? You guys should have to have like, a badge or something on your helmets, hey?" ( thinks a moment, then realizes AGAIN that he tried to sell to a sheriff ) "Awwwwwwwwww, Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!!!!!!" Minnesota, land of Canadian Hillbillies!! ( no offense intended to the good people of Canada who post here! )

I don't know about that...I don't want to THINK about what Maury PinStripes has done in ( or TO ) that chair!!! Friday night, MPS..... See you then, Show!

The SICK part of all this is, that no-name flash-in-the-pan chick from last season has sold 1.3 MILLION copies of her CD. Can you hear the "music" section at Y'All Mart? "BAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!! BAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!" "Ah seent 'er on thuh TEE-VEE! She's awful taluntid!!" And yet in a year nobody will own up to having bought the damn thing! Know anyone who proudly displays their Milli Vanilli or Vanilla Ice records? Same thing here! Next is "American Child" or whatever they're calling the Junior High Talent Show they're getting ready to inflict upon the public. I can't wait to avoid that show too!

OVERTIME SENATORS VICTORY!!! Game 7 in Ottawa - GO SENS!!! Meanwhile, the Sucky Ducks sit and wait for the winners. ( Yes, I'll still call them the Sucky Ducks - I don't care how well they're doing!!! )

Friday, huh? Got an extra chair?

If you want Grace to find you, just carry a TV camera and a microphone! Has there ever been a guy who leeches onto TV cameras more than Grace? Maybe Gary Carter....MAYBE... Mark Grace....ugh.... :finger

I ate carrots today - they gave me gas. Cheese tastes good on crackers or bread, or ALL BY ITSELF. I think I got a whitehead on my lip - or is it SARS? Posting unrelated tidbits is FUN!

And he didn't even have a shoe deal!!!

Yes, that arm was unlucky to be attached to a dope who'd go climbing alone...

All I'll say is that Biddle is being asked to save games and he's doing just that. To that end, he's doing his job - and doing it quite well right now. 12 saves and one blown save = a good job, in my opinion. I don't give a rat's ass about statistics - get the job done and get the W. Wins and Losses are the ONLY statistics that matter in a team sport.

Tough + Stupid - An Arm = that guy

Not just on paper, either - there was a LOT of good stuff happening towards the end of spring - Konerko was hitting a ton, Frank was coming around after a bad start, the pitching looked good, and they hadn't kicked the ball around that much. There was good reason for people to be excited about this team. Then you factor in what SHOULD have been a relatively easy early schedule and you had every reason to think the Sox would jump of the gate in a big way. My guess was that they'd start 17-5 or 15-7 at the worst. Shows how wrong you can be. The addition of Colon, Daubach, Koch, Gordon and Loaiza made it look like the Sox had addressed several glaring needs, and the only question marks I had were in CF, 2B and behind the plate. Who would EVER have guessed that so many things would all go wrong at once??? I keep waiting for the "real" 2003 Sox to show up, but more and more I'm wondering if they already have. MAN, I hope not...

Have you had pizza in St. Louis? It's Velveeta on baseball cards - it's HORRIBLE. I thought the f***in box was EMPTY when they delivered it!! On the topic of TV commercials, I haven't seen many of them since the invention of the remote - I LOVE the remote control!!!

Thank you for the cushy job....just put a cushion under my big ass and a cooler next to my seat and I'm fine! I'd rather be the GM, though, and make some CHANGES round here!!! "Maury....BENCHED!!!"

Then I wish the Sox would quit stealing the "drop a popup" sign, and the "pitcher get hammered" sign, and the "ground into a double play" sign, cuz those are the signs they seem to be acting on... Stealing signs is apparently just part of the game. You still have to hit the damn ball and make plays in the field, and the Twins are doing that WAAAAAAAY more often than the Sox are.

I prefer Craptastic or Poopariffic!!!

cwsox, I completely respect your opinion, and I'm sorry that your experience at Wrigley was bad. I'm usually pretty lucky to get decent seats when I go there. I agree that it's kinda cramped, but I just go in knowing that, and when I think I might be particularly bugged by that, I get an extra ticket for a "buffer seat". I don't stress about the toilets because I'm just in and out, and I go when the Cubs are batting so the lines are shorter - they're the shortest when SamMe is due up! US Cellular is definitely a more comfortable park, with better variety and availability of food, better sight lines in the lower bowl, and better, cleaner johns. It's also MUCH closer to where I live, so THAT's good too.

Other ballparks I have been to: Wrigley Field - sorry, but I love that park - the old parks can't be beat - I couldn't care less about the toilets or the pillars or any of that crap - it's a real nice place to see a game Miller Park - not too too bad - kinda boxy, feels like a warehouse, but not terrible Busch Stadium - went there in the mid-80s, when they still had that faded green carpet on the field - didn't like it that much, even though I like the Cardinals a lot - it was kind of a dump Bank One Ballpark - I liked it a lot, actually - even though it felt a little like Miller Park, it had a nice vibe to it - unfortunately, nobody worth looking at in the pool that day!! and of course, REAL Comiskey - which I miss a LOT - the first ballpark i ever stepped foot in - refer to my Wrigley comments - REAL Comiskey was a BALLPARK Also been to a couple minor league ballparks, which serve their purpose very well

or Wayne Van Dorp of the Blackhawks! oh, I took this name because I criticize everything and don't really ever offer a better alternative!! ...it was either The Critic or "Mike East" or "Mike West" - North and South were taken!!!

Since they won't tell us his name, I'll just call him Goober. According to today's SunTimes, Goober has apparently violated his probation 4 times since his heartfelt plea to the judge this spring. So now the prosecutors want to do what they should have done all along....punish the loser! Can't wait to see his "extreme makeover" for the court date...although they probably won't be able to show his face until he reaches 18...at which point he'll STILL be cascading through the criminal justice system for something or another, I'll bet...

To name just a few: Slight shoulder separation - from hockey Bronchitis MANY stitches from hockey pucks/sticks ( but luckily, just a few on my pretty face ) Hamstring pulls Bruised kidney - from hockey ( why did I ever play hockey?? ) Broken left arm Slightly arthritic toe ( just like Shaq!! ) ...and I'm afraid that I might have a problem with my left arm or shoulder - luckily again, it's not my throwing arm!

If the Sox just get themselves right and start winning games, there's plenty of games left against both of those teams. No point in scoreboard watching in May, I don't think... I like the fact that the twins are playing extra innings before the weekend series - get them nice and tired!

With all due respect, it's gonna take one HELL of a movie to bump GoodFellas out of my top spot. ...and that movie, I can safely say, will NOT star Keanu Reeves...