Quin

Kade McClure to the Giants for Gregory Santos.

Please put this sad team out of their misery.

The obvious answer is it's just the Chicago weather.

I have no idea where to place this other than in response to this.

"The Andrew Benintendi signing is good" feels so snarky that I love it

We solve AJ's problem with a new attraction. An area of the 500 deck will be turned into a giant helicopter. It'll take suburbanites home after the game. Piloted by their White Sox personality of choice. Free food during the ride if they win.

AJ' suburban stadium would be known as the Jizz Home, obviously.

why does it not say "CHAZ JIZZ" on the box

In conjunction with the thread title, I believe this means you think a suburban stadium is stupid.

Question: "Ways to improve Guaranteed Rate" AJ's Cousin: "Obvious solution is move to Arlington Park!"

That's a fair point. I restored the non-political parts of the convo. But again, regrettably, if we keep this thread, let's talk about White Sox f*** Up #____

I just lifted the whole discussion.

Ok everyone, let's steer away from talk that's beginning to get political and, as much as it pains me to say it, about Mike fucking Clevinger.

Every Friday is "Foodie Friday" where Portillo's Hamburger, Footlong Comiskey Dog, and all the others are in the dunk tank. If they get sunk, their respective food is free for the next 5 minutes in the park.

This one is inspired. Also: The Crosstown Clash. During the Cubs series, a section of the bleachers is given White Sox and Cubs themed sock'em boppers that track hits. Whichever fanbase lans the most hits gets a Manfred Runner starting in the 7th inning.

If you remove certain data points, you can get any answer you want. Like, if we just count Frank Thomas' stats from 2001 onward, is he really a Hall of Famer with a .262/.376/.884 slash line, no All-Star appearances and only 38 games played at first base? Probably not.

In the dugout. Controlled by fan vote.

I feel like Zach has shown that he couldn't lead a team of Ayo, Coby, Terry, Pat and Tony Bradley to the playoffs. I'm trying to sell everyone else. DDR, Vuc, Caruso, Jones, Drummond, Dragic, Javonte. If you can get something for them, sell. I just don't want to settle for Westbrook + two far off Lakers firsts for Zach.

I'm confused, we're agreeing on this. I'm just talking about whether or not he has the most value at the trade deadline or the offseason.

Neglecting to mention Frank Thomas seems intentional.

To expand on this, add a Hawk Harrelson soundboard to the goose. Home run call? The goose is belching fire and yelling "PUT IT ON THE BOARD!" "YOU'VE GOTTA BE BLEEPING ME" after a bad review. "A Kansas City special" whenever Pedro Grifol appears on the field, the Royals do anything, or a ball sneaks through, even if it they're not facing the Royals. Another feature: The Kaskade Hotbox A room filled with edibles and joints. Playing non-stop Kaskade to remind us of the brief shining moment in White Sox history. Leury Garcia is found here.

After the club released the renderings of the Buffalo Wild Wings Experience* on the 500 Club, I figure Soxtalk can figure out ways to improve the fan experience at the stadium. Non-serious answers only. *Credit to @Snopek for this descriptor.

Oh most definitely. Trade Zach now if you get a good package for him, but I'm not against holding him, letting him stat pad without DDR, Vuc and Lonzo (who the hell is gonna take shots from him? Coby and Pat?), and let him drive up his offseason price.

I have returned to the sell (almost) everyone boat. It's so insane that with Lonzo, this team operates as greater than the sum of its parts. Without, far below. I'd keep Lonzo, Ayo and Pat since you're not getting much for them. Feel out the market on Zach - with DDR and Vuc gone he might get more in the offseason. After that, hope you get to retain the draft pick (prayers for Wemby or Scoot) and then rebuild around a young core (sigh...again) of Lonzo, Ayo, Pat, Terry, (maybe) Coby and see where it goes from there.