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Manny Ramirez Escapes Murder Charges with “Manny Being Manny” Defense Boston Red Sox outfielder Manny Ramirez was picked up by Boston police Sunday night for murdering two people, but avoided formal charges when he explained that the brutal slayings were simply “Manny being Manny.” Witnesses saw Ramirez beat to death two people who heckled him early Sunday morning outside his Boston home. The victims were native New Yorkers who reportedly mocked Ramirez’s shoddy outfield play when they happened to see the slugger step outside his front door to grab the morning paper. “Manny just snapped all of a sudden,” said an eyewitness. “He grabbed an umbrella rack from inside his front door, ran out of the house and just started bludgeoning them. It was brutal and very frightening.” Police were called to the scene, gathered the reports of eyewitnesses, and took Ramirez into custody after Boston’s game Sunday night against the Oakland A’s to formally charge him with two murders. But within minutes, Ramirez was cleared by police and allowed to return home after he explained his actions. “He laid it out for us very clearly,” said Detective Cliff Farber. “He explained that his actions were just ‘Manny being Manny,’ and really – there isn’t any kind of comeback for that. I mean, as a Boston Red Sox fan, I know that certain things come with the package that is Manny Ramirez. If you want his bat, you also have to have his glove and his general aloofness. That’s just ‘Manny being Manny,’ you know? And if ‘Manny being Manny’ now includes a few murders or violent crimes, so be it. We’re trying to repeat as world champions here. There’s not a New England sports fan in existence who wouldn’t forgive the brutal slayings of two dead New Yorkers if that would get us another title.” Legal experts say Ramirez is lucky he used his trademark excuse to the police and not in a court because it likely would not have worked before a judge. “To my knowledge, a ‘Manny being Manny’-type defense has never worked in a trial,” said Charlotte Chanel, a Boston attorney. “Charles Manson tried to use a ‘That’s just Charles being Charles’ defense when he was on trial, but the jury didn’t go for it. Although, when you think about all Manny has gotten away with in this town since he arrived, you never know what might have happened if he got a judge and jury that are Red Sox fans.”

Who hates Iowa State more? Sports God? Sports Jesus? Sports Buddha? Sports Mohammed?

QUOTE(Felix @ Feb 17, 2006 -> 06:56 PM) According to various admins, not listening to warnings about shutting up and constant flaming of other users. Here's a thread on it. Yup. He was being, for lack of a better team, an asshole.

QUOTE(whitesoxfan101 @ Feb 18, 2006 -> 02:15 PM) Yeah, somebody with a lot of clout in the sports god world really doesn't like Iowa State. You ain't kidding.

Greg McDermott and the Panthers can blow me. Go Bison. Oh, and Iowa State beating Oklahoma by 6 at the half in Norman. This team frustrates me so.

Pinned for gearhead pleasure.

QUOTE(SSH2005 @ Feb 17, 2006 -> 05:00 PM) I was just listing the three righty options. I don't expect him to win a job either. I'd likely list the options as Redding, Baj and then Tracey. Redding, due to his experience. Of course, if he stinks in ST, then Baj.

I still highly doubt Tracey will be in the pen.

http://tcaa.puretecmo.com/nit06.html NIT coverage for me and Greasy. Yay! Seeds!

Buehrle's save.

QUOTE(SnB @ Feb 17, 2006 -> 03:06 PM) you're an admin now, you have power, go make 'em an offer they can't refuse. We don't have that great of power. Yet.

QUOTE(BabyJesus69 @ Feb 17, 2006 -> 03:09 PM) if indiana takes alford, i'll help him move down there The last thing instate schools want to see is someone who has a friggin' plan against the likes of ISU and UNi.

Kurt just replied and said flyers should likely be ready nezt week.

Neato. I'll get the flyer out as soon as I can. It'll probably be a while, but I'll ask Kurt today.

QUOTE(KWs OK for Me @ Feb 16, 2006 -> 09:51 PM) Yea, you wish buddy. Some people are born natural test takers. Doesn't mean I don't get the greatest grades in schools, but line me up next to anyone for a standardized test and I will kick the s*** out of it and everyone else. I legitly got a 1530 (800 Math 730 Verbal). So screw you and your sarcasm 800 +730 1530 OK....story checks out.

Duke for being an ass.

Section 1. While My Guitar Gently Weeps - The Beatles vs. Like A Rolling Stone - Bob Dylan All Along the Watchtower - Jimi Hendrix vs. Baba O'Reilly - The Who Section 2. Street Fighting Man - The Rolling Stones vs. A Day in the Life - The Beatles

QUOTE(KWs OK for Me @ Feb 16, 2006 -> 05:44 PM) 33 on the ACT, but how does 1530 on the SAT sound? [only took each once, none of this take it till you do well bulls***] But what KW's OK fails to mention was that it was on the new, 2400 point SAT.

He needs to, because he's losing a ton after this year.

QUOTE(Steve9347 @ Feb 16, 2006 -> 04:45 PM) personally, i had a great time while i was at Northern Michigan University (hockey college), and a great time at Northern Illinois University... Depends what you are going for... PS f*** AKRON PSS let's have an ACT score contest. I got a 32 As did I. There's a lot of old people here like Steff and YASNY who are bright but are far too old for standardized testing.

Happy BDay!

QUOTE(RockRaines @ Feb 16, 2006 -> 09:32 AM) I would buy all of you some Casey's General Store Pizza. A little strange, but anyone from Iowa will know it's damn nice of you.

QUOTE(Chisoxfn @ Feb 16, 2006 -> 12:38 PM) For the money, if JD is healthy he is one of the better bargains in baseball. He's one of the better defensive right fielders and he's a pretty smart player. He had a lot of early season struggles, but aside from that he played tremendous for the Sox. Considering he'll be in the 5 or 6 spot of the lineup (although I've seen a few people suggest him in the 3 hole) I think he's gonna be just fine for us. Plus he's a really awesome character guy and I'm glad our team finally has more of that. That said, health issues are the main reason I wouldn't consider him totally under-rated. If he truly is behind all his injuries (last year was a good sign) than I'd definately say he's about as underrated of a RF as there is. Lets not forget he led all RFers in HR's. I agree, especially with the character part. We saw how great chemistry can help a team. Plus, I think JR would pay a guy nearly anything to be a Sox World Series MVP. That being said, I still think we'll see Tad in the 3-hole at some point in this season if no one sticks. Not for good, mind you, but if his power comes back and his average stays up, it's a possibility. ***Jason: You do realize we have an edit function, right? You can quote all the posts in one reply. Post whore.

Here's a name: Greg McDermott from Northern Iowa. He's an asshole (at least I think of him as one) But I can see him ending up in Missouri or possibly even Indiana.

QUOTE(Steff @ Feb 16, 2006 -> 11:38 AM) Seriously! I'm far, far, faaaaarrrr from prudish.. but yikes.. Far. FARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR, But seriously, couldn't these girls at least blow someone with some talent?