The Critic

The good news is that Phish is breaking up. The BAD news is that now there will be 4 or 5 or 6 or 7 new awful Phish-based bands, depending on how many members were in Phish.

NOTHING can kill the Home Run Porch!!! It will RISE from the ashes of fiscal constraints and engulf us ALL!!!!!!!!! It will coat everything in its path in a green slime ( which will give us the long-coveted green seats, by the way... ) on its way to WORLD DOMINATION!!!!!! .....a HR Porch would be cool if it happens....

The BEST cooking show ever! Funny, informative and the food looks great! Problem is, Alton Brown's recipes are so involved that everything takes six hours to make, so I've never tried any of his dishes. AND, his books are MEGA-expensive, like 50 bucks each!!! but kudos on the AB reference, Cheat!

22??? Christ Almighty....I can still remember my 22nd birthday....the year was 1985, and Motley Crue ruled the Earth....a 5'3" dwarf named Ronnie James Dio was flashing the devil horns to throngs of mulleted youngsters everywhere....heartbroken Cub fans were still stinging from the playoff choke of the previous fall....( some things never change ) .....and a young, healthy and optimistic Critic was playing 8 games of softball per week, taking only Saturdays off ( unless there was a tournament somewhere ).... Happy Birthday, ChiSoxyGirl - enjoy your youth, as someday YOU'LL be turning 41 too! ...as I am on Saturday..... :puke

To be honest, ncorgbl's posts often bored me. I don't miss him at all, really. I miss HSC and RPS much more, truth be told - I know RPS hasn't officially abandoned this board, but he hardly ever posts here anymore and he was the one who introduced me to Soxtalk. Now you know who to blame....

cw, you really SHOULD stop padding your post totals by repeating the same thing over and over and over and over.... Last year at the All-Star Game I had seats in row 11 of section 553, and the view was VERY good. I even went up to that very last seat in the top row by the corner, and to my surprise THAT view wasn't even all that bad ( except for the fact that NO fly ball is ever hit high enough to reach eye level ). I had always promised myself that I would sit in that last seat someday, and I'm glad I did before they took it down. Fact is, as we've said many times on this board, USCF is a TERRIFIC place to see a ballgame, IMO FAR superior to the revered and venerable Deadly Confines.

I apologize to those who were trying to use the UPC from the Pepsi products. And I guess I owe an apology to those using the word Sox in the UPC code space on the website - if the Sox didn't want that to work, they wouldn't let it work. I work with a batch of lowlifes who try to scam their way to getting free stuff all the time, so I brought that attitude on here, and I shouldn't have, so I'm sorry.

It's a sad sad day when people are too damn cheap to buy a stinkin' soda to get a half-price ticket ( or MORE than one half-price ticket - you only need one UPC code to get multiple tickets ) to a baseball game. The Sox and Pepsi make the offer in good faith as a way to sell a Pepsi, the least anyone can do is buy the damn thing to get the discount.

Some Twinkie losers whipped a ball at you guys?? Real classy. Glad you had fun, and REALLY glad that the Sox put a hurtin' on those poor poor injured Twins.

I had a door-to-door guy come up to me with that offer. It's a good deal, but I can't go to many more games than I already have planned to. In my single/childless days, perhaps, but those days are long gone.... And to answer the question, I have enjoyed the times I've been in the UD - EXCEPT FOR THE CONCOURSE LAW, OF COURSE!!! The sight lines are not THAT bad at all, and the only weird thing is tracking flyballs. I'd MUCH rather sit in the UD at USCF than sit behind a pole at Wrigley, or even in that area where you can only see a "letterbox version" of the game because of the upper deck overhang.

You should have seen the people at wrigley flock around the Cubs mascot too. You know, the freeloading crack addict known as Woo Woo! People were actually getting that dope's autograph! Of course, I was yelling "Crack! WOO! Crack! WOO!!"

Maybe it's because I'm getting so old and don't have the mindset to be pissed off at everything anymore, but I find I'm becoming much more tolerant of things at the ballpark that would have seriously pissed me off a few years ago. Such as the Weak Bladder Crowd - I recently went to The Deadly Confines with my cousin ( he's a HUGE Cub fan go figure ) and the guys next to us were CONSTANTLY getting up to purchase new beers and "dispense" of the old ones. It happened so often that it could have become contentious, but instead we ended up making jokes about it with them. They wound up buying us a couple beers for being cool about it, so it all worked out well! I will NEVER understand people's weird thrill about being seen on camera in the background of a sporting event or television news story. It's always bizarre to me to see people waving and jumping around behind some field reporter talking about a murder at a restaurant or a deadly car crash or something. The swearing around my 4-year-old irritates me, but I realize that when you have thousands of people at a public place, you're going to have some language flying around. Most people will at least try to scale it down if you ask them in a non-aggressive manner, but it can make for an unpleaseant experience at the park if they refuse to.

Ron Santo has a ton more MLB at-bats than we do, too, but he's an imbecile, as is Harold Reynolds. Kruk's job is to be kind of a goofball, so I give him a bit of a pass. BBTN is a moderately interesting show, but it's nothing that I look forward to watching or go out of my way to see. If it's on I check it out, but if I miss it......well, I don't really MISS it, if you know what I mean...

This news makes me very happy. Kimmel's show is a disappointment.

I, for one, would be happy to find out how these guys would fare in the playoffs because that means the Sox would have GOTTEN THERE. And before anyone starts with the "oh, you're just happy to get there?" business, you DO have to get there before you can advance, and I'm not going to put the cart before the horse. Do I like our 1 through 3 pitchers? Yes. Would I like a better #1 to push our current 1-3 down to 2-4? Yes. Do I think the Sox will get a better #1 ( or even a #2 ) to do that? No. Given the situation and the well-documented "financial restraints", the most I expect is a trade for a #4 or 5 guy at best. Anything more than that would be a VERY WELCOME surprise....come on Kenny and Jerry.....SURPRISE ME!!!

Glad to sort it out for you, Steff.....we know you've been having comprehension problems lately....if there's anything else I can help explain for you, just let me know....

Absolutely Simmons, no one else is even close. I wish he hadn't gone to Kimmel's show, since he writes a lot less for espn.com now. I also like Dan LeBetard - he's funny and sarcastic too.

The Sox have a Byung-Hyun Kim - his name is Shingo Takatsu, should we just start him instead? I don't like the idea of Kim in a Sox uni - if they're going to trade for a guy, I'd like someone a little better than him.

I think we've all resigned ourselves to wanting what the Sox can actually get rather than what they really need. Fact is, they drained a lot of prospects in last year's trades and aren't willing to take on significant salary, so a cheap/attainable 5th guy is all Sox fans can hope for at this point. Dreaming is nice, but at some point we all have to give in to "financial restraints".

What a game! Congrats to Tampa Bay, and GO DOUSE THE FLAMES!!!! I feel bad for Amonte and JR, but it wasn't meant to be.

My favorite genres: Punk ( including SOME emo like Face To Face, Hey Mercedes ) Metal ( including SOME glam like Butch Walker, Glitterati, Star Spangles ) SOME classic rock ( such as Thin Lizzy, UFO, Boston ) SOME rap ( such as De La Soul, Run DMC, some Outkast ) My least favorite genres: Most rap Most classic rock Country ( except for Johnny Cash )

Is that any way for a mother, not to mention fake British royalty, to act onstage??? SHAMEFUL.....

[NOTAREALQUOTE] Just before he finished his speech, Cosby took a HUGE s*** onstage and told the audience that "all y'all mothaf***azz can eat mah JELLO PUDDING!!" [/NOTAREALQUOTE] He really has regained his edge!

My favorite Beatles song has always been "And Your Bird Can Sing". Can't tell you why, but I've always loved that song.

I wish I could get excited about the Calgary Flames, but they do nothing for me. Then again, neither do the Sharks. It's all about the Eastern Conference for me this year.