JPN366

Today, the number 3 from Arby's, motherf***ers! And I've discovered and become infatuated with the J.J. Gargantuan from Jimmy John's.

Funny, I'm at work and they've got one of the satellite dishes tuned to a raw feed from ESPN and I'm watching the White Sox take light batting practice. Gillaspie hasn't bulked up 20 pounds from the looks of it.

I've worked on every holiday, motherf***ers! Every damn one.

Based on the current timeline, we should expect to see Brian Williams get his donut hole tongue punched at the beginning of March By Ian on Shameless on Showtime.

QUOTE (KyYlE23 @ Feb 11, 2015 -> 09:22 AM) get a net, hold it above your head, and wait for the joke to come back again This guy gets it.

QUOTE (Reddy @ Feb 11, 2015 -> 09:21 AM) A girl has always played Peter Pan in the theatre since the dawn of time. "I have to explain to my 5 year old son why a girl is playing Peter Pan." No easy task. He already gets boners because of females. I don't want to confuse his boner. And I was making a joke in general.

QUOTE (PlaySumFnJurny @ Feb 11, 2015 -> 09:03 AM) I am confused, yet intrigued, by this reference to rim jobs. I am also surprised he does not just resign. I watched it over and over again, it's stuck in my head.

First, I have to explain to my 5 year old son why a girl is playing Peter Pan. Then, that girl gets her a$$ eaten on pay cable. Now her Dad turns out to be a liar and is taken off air?! What about the children?! Think of the children!

It's a sad irony that in Black History month, there are judges that are trying to deny people civil rights in my home state. Only in Alabama would that happen. At least the zealots aren't winning and it's a historic day here.

QUOTE (Jenksismyb**** @ Jan 16, 2015 -> 10:37 AM) Do an activity over a gift. Dinner/movie, a show, etc. Time together is better than a gift. A mix CD works.

I could watch (and do) that over and over, but I'm a nasty SOB anyway.

Wily Mo Pena could platoon with LaRoche.

QUOTE (chw42 @ Oct 6, 2014 -> 01:43 PM) I think the Note 4 is like $300 on-contract. You'd be paying $50 for a newer device. That's worth it IMO. My buyback quote is only good until the 20th, so I need to get a new phone now so I can trade in my old one. There's no official release date for the Note 4. I'm not on a consumer contract, my wife works for Sprint. So I'm on her employee plan. Employees aren't eligible for consumer offers. The Note 4 is going to be $300-$350, so I'd rather pay $46 than $96 or $146. I just want a bigger phone, so I'm not that picky.

QUOTE (chw42 @ Oct 6, 2014 -> 01:34 PM) Why not wait for the Note 4? Because I'll only have to pay $46 for the Note 3 when I get my buyback credit.

Switching from an iPhone 4S to a Samsung Galaxy Note 3, any advice? The Sprint Buyback program is giving me $204 for my iPhone 4S FYI.

QUOTE (Steve9347 @ Oct 4, 2014 -> 08:31 AM) I am so f***ing sick of Sons of Anarchy. I've been with it since episode one when a young Jax walked into a convenience store. I stuck with it through some terrible seasons (Gemma's dad, anyone?). This is pissing me off. I'm too busy for a 2.5 hour long premiere. I'm sitting down for the 4th time to try to finish this off. Over the first few seasons, they brilliantly summarized a bunch of storylines over musical montage. Now, apparently, it has to happen every f***ing episode which has to be a minimum of an hour and fifteen minutes. God, thus show really went to s***. I'm caught up to season 7, episode 1. If Gemma survives till the end, I'll be furious. I've taken to calling the show "Gemma Of Anarchy" since she ruins everything. On that Afterword show they did that followed the first episode, even Katey Sagal is oblivious to the fact that her character is horrible, controlling, selfish and destructive. She's all like, her heart's in the right place. Whatever. Killing was a massive gut punch. I was damn near in tears. But killing was absolutely horrible. My wife keeps making the point that Gemma is Vic Mackey, and if that's really the case, I think we're all in for massive disappointment at how things end for her. Not that the ending to The Shield was bad, just if that's how things end for Gemma, it will be a huge fail.

QUOTE (Brian @ Oct 3, 2014 -> 04:36 PM) Bad Judge is as bad at Kate Walsh is hot. God, she is, isn't she.

QUOTE (MEANS @ Sep 17, 2014 -> 03:47 PM) I think TV execs know the power of a good villain so that's why she got another season on BB and was on the Amazing Race. Still doesn't change the fact that she's like nails on a chalkboard and is quite delusional when it comes to thinking people actually like her. I don't view Frankie as jerk as much as she was or even previous "hated" players on BB. He only really starts getting annoying when he interacts with Julie. I'd f*** Rachel. I love redheads.

QUOTE (Brian @ Sep 16, 2014 -> 08:15 PM) Would've been better with a real crowd booing him and his stupid glitter shower. He was booed. CBS edited out the boos. He actually got a mix of boos and cheers. Be prepared to see more of him. Despite the fact that no one likes him, CBS is enamored with him and will probably bring him back for another season or give him his own show. You heard the interview with Julie. They continued to act as if being Ariana Grande's brother somehow was a huge secret and it was so important. CBS is all in with him and it will be at our misery. Chuck Lorre is already being implored to develop some kind of vehicle for him, I don't doubt.

There's a reason why the population of the suburbs North, South, East and West of Birmingham exploded over the past 25 years. At one point, I think in the mid 90's, the southern "over the mountain" suburbs of Birmingham were the fastest growing area of the United States. That's where I live, 20 miles south.

QUOTE (Stan Bahnsen @ Sep 12, 2014 -> 03:04 PM) So maybe a day game would be preferable if I find myself down that way? I would avoid downtown Birmingham like the plague. Any time of day.

QUOTE (NorthSideSox72 @ Sep 12, 2014 -> 02:17 PM) The new stadium has gotten universally very good reviews. Sounds like it's really just the neighborhood that is a problem? Too bad it ended up that way. It's nice, it's just... stale and cookie cutter. It's an exact copy of Winston-Salem's and Charlotte's. There's a few "Birmingham" touches to it. They restored this sign and added it to the stadium.

QUOTE (SoxAce @ Aug 30, 2014 -> 12:38 PM) JPN is going to enjoy watching that Barons team next year. Hell, I might have to take a trip up there. Nope. I hate the new stadium and I've only been there once. It's in a bad part of town that I grew up near and is too far away from where I live now. People have been shot and killed right outside of it. Birmingham annually makes the top 10 list of most dangerous cities in the United States.

QUOTE (Jenksismyb**** @ Sep 9, 2014 -> 12:14 PM) So many, but from my 2-3 years of experience: Pregnancy: 1) Prepare for the mood swings and irrational emotional outbursts. The joke about pregnant woman being crazy is overplayed, but there's a little but of truth to it. Finding your pregnant wife bawling over that Sarah McLachlan animal rescue commercial or a Cheerios Mothers' Day commercial, may happen. 2) That said, don't treat her like she'd disabled or anything. That'll get you on the s*** list too. Be supportive. 3) Don't wait until the last minute to get the nursery ready. He/she may decide to come to the world a little earlier than expected. Once the kid arrives: 1) Enjoy it. Every good and bad thing. Sounds crazy, and you'll hear this from everyone and you won't believe it, but time flies with kids. Even at 2 years, it seems like 2 weeks. 2) At some point you'll be one of those poor Asian women in awful pornos -you'll be s*** on, pissed on, spit on, puked on, booger-ed on, etc. Be prepared. 3) Read to your son/daughter from the day they're born. Introduce them to books even if they can't (or don't) pay attention. One day it will click, and then reading will be a great 5-10 minute bonding ritual before bed (or whenever it's needed). 4) I don't know if there's any truth to this medically speaking, but I'd recommend it anyway - mess with the kids hands/feet/toes when they're infants like you would with a new puppy. It's a 15 minute battle to clip my kids' nails. He hates it. It is f***ing brutal. I want to break a window every time we do it. I feel like if I had touched and caressed his feet, toes and hands more, this wouldn't happen. I hear this advice all the time for dogs and I bet it works for a kid too. Or I could be crazy. I dunno. It's worth a shot. 5) Kids are durable. You'll be overly sensitive to everything at first, as you should, but trust me, kids are durable. 6) A key one - don't buy a lot of unnecessary s***, and tell your family/friends not to get you unnecessary s***. Toys specifically. At each stage there is a max amount of toys that each kid will ever use or play with. Like 2 is probably the number. Maybe 3. Use rotations. Let the kid play with 1-2 things for a week or two, and when it gets old put them away and get another 1-2 toys. When that gets old, bring back the original ones. Rinse and repeat. They won't know the difference for a while (years). And you'll save yourself the headache of dealing with multiple loud, flashing toys at one time. That and they take up a lot of space, even in a home. This was the biggest regret I think I've had so far as a parent. We should have requested money instead of gifts. Except books. Again, you can never have enough books. How is this different from any other time for a woman?