The Critic

...and when it's time to pay them, they'll ALL be gone...

Well, all the Cub fans I know were completely anti-management when that went down. When Maddux came back to accept the Cubs offer he was told that the money wasn't there anymore - the Cubs used it to sign Jose Guzman, Randy Myers and one other guy I can't remember right now ( a starter I think ). That management is gone, and most of my Cub friends are GEEKED about the idea of Maddux getting #300 with them.

If there IS a hotshot in this draft, the Penguins will draft him, then trade him to the Red Wings or Flyers or some other team who gives a f*** about winning. Even if the Slacks lucked into a decent player, it would take them 3 years to sign him after trying to lowball the signing bonus. f***ing worthless afterthought disorgan-I-zation...

f*** the Slacks. Trade away the only guy who gives a s***. Go to hell, worthless hockey club. You suck.

A-Rod was so desperate to get out of Texas that he approached Selig at Sammy Sosa's November birthday party in the Dominican Republic to let the commissioner know he was extremely unhappy with the Rangers. Selig listened closely as Rodriguez explained why he wanted out. When news broke about the possible Manny Ramirez trade, Selig figured Boston represented an ideal landing place. I can almost picture it now: ARod "Hey, Bud, I've been trying to talk to you all night! Willya PLEASE quit salsa dancing with Sammy's sister and TALK to me for a minute?" Bud "Okay, OKAY.....but if you're just cock-blockin' me, I'll be HELLA PISSED OFF!" ARod "Whatever dude - listen, I am SICK of living in Texas!! You GOTTA help me get out of there!!! Is there anything you-" Sosa "AYYYYYYY, Meestur Seelig, AYYYYY, Ollex, ow yoo dooeeeen'? Whatchoo talkeen abow? Ay hope yoor talkeen bow MEEEEE!!!!!!! Ay yam SO waysted rye now!!!!! HOPPEE BOORDAYEE TOO MEEEE....." Bud "That's nice, Sammy - did you like the gift I got you?" Sosa "Ohhh yessss, dot was a NICE theen to doo, geevinn mee dee corged bot back!!! Zangyoo, Bud!" ARod "So ANYWAY, Bud, back to my situation..." Bud "HEY! I TRIED to get you onto the Red Sox!! YOU f***ed it up by playing Mr. NICE GUY!!! 'I don't want to upset anybody, I'll play wherever I'm told'....what a PUSSY. Look, get your agent on it - if he can get a deal done with the Yankees - and ONLY the Yankees - we'll make it work. Otherwise, have fun in last place!!!" Okay, maybe it didn't go quite like that, but I love the idea of Bud Selig at Sammy Sosa's birthday party in the Dominican!! Maybe they had a Mark Grace pinata!!! HA!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND it ends at 3 in a row. Slackies drop a BIG GAME against the Crapitals. 4-0 losers - what else is new?

I'd really like to have to get to our #9 hitter before laughing. Who's leading off for the Sox this year?

"Flown past" was meant as sarcasm, so I guess the green was in order. I agree with your agreement, so we're in agreeance!

Okay then, the bench is in Montreal....what's your point??

Greg Maddux is still a quality pitcher who will win 15 games. He always does. This IS a great move, like them or not. I have a feeling that if the Sox were able to sign him, a lot of us would be extolling the same virtues we are now denying or undervaluing. Fact of the matter is: Maddux is a better #3 than Zambrano. Zambrano is a better #4 than Clement. Clement is a better #5 than Cruz. Add to this the fact that their bullpen is MUCH improved and Maddux won't be asked to extend into the 7th or 8th inning, and the move becomes that much better. Unfortunately, it really is going to take injuries or something even more freaky than Bartman to derail their train this year.

Here's the way they broke it down on SportsCenter: Lofton CF Jeter SS Rodriguez 3B Giambi 1B Sheffield RF Williams DH Matsui LF Posada C Wilson 2B That's a fairly massive offensive attack, and Nick Johnson's on the bench. Not bad, but again, the starting pitching is thin and they don't have much left to trade for more pitching. That's where their weakness lies. Of course, they can always just BUY more, right??? :puke

Don't know if this has been mentioned yet ( too lazy on a Sunday morning to look through all 5 pages ) but either Enrique Wilson or Miguel Cairo look to be the 2B. I'd give the early nod to Wilson for his bat. That can be one hell of an offensive lineup, but every team has an Achilles' Heel, and the Yanks is their starting pitching - 2 very real health concerns ( Lieber and Brown ) and one very real consistency concern ( Contreras ). Mussina and Vasquez are solid, although I've seen some rumblings about the number of innings Vasquez has thrown the past couple years. Don't know if that was "wishful pessimism" by Red Sox fans or what...

Yeah, it was GREAT! Triumph is almost always a highlight on Conan's show. The Star Wars bit is legendary, of course, and this one came close. Watching the smug-ass Quebecois go "harrumph" once it was clear that a dog puppet was insulting them was beautiful. Quebec really should secede from Canada, so they can stop poisoning Canada's reputation. Quebec is just France with worse shoes and a cold.

zero interest - sorry.

I'm tired of Adam Sandler in any forum. He's overplayed. Must say, though, "Happy Gilmore" is still one of my favorite movies ever.

I had a nice Valentine's Day - got my wife a mushy card ( made her cry with what I wrote - I STILL GOT IT! ), some choco's and the Best Of Squeeze CD ( that "Bands Reunited" thing re-ignited her interest in Squeeze ) and then she totally trumped me by getting me a NICE replica Carolina Hurricanes home jersey ( how you like THAT, FanOf14?? ). I made her a nice dinner - chipotle soup and a big salad - and after the kid went to bed, we watched Lost In Translation ( overrated, and more than a little boring ) and we went to sleep with the sounds of sports-talk radio buzzing about ARod. Romantic, I know.....

They're at best a mediocre team with everyone healthy, because that's what they were built to be. The injuries made them worse this year, but only because their horrid ownership and management provided ZERO depth. They've written this season off to prepare for the lockout anyway, so there's no reason to give one s*** about how they play this year at all. Now they've FLOWN past Washington and tied Columbus as only the FOURTH-WORST team in the NHL. Kudos to them for this late-season push toward the lower-middle of the pack. When Thibault and Daze return, LOOK OUT CAROLINA AND ATLANTA, CUZ YOU'RE NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Doubt it. I think at this point they go with what they have. They still have too many outfielders and the Sox won't take on significant salary, so I don't see a deal there.

The speculation I've heard is that they'd let Clement walk when his contract is up and take their chances with some of the good starter prospects they have in the minors now ( Guzman, Sisco, Brownlie, etc ). I don't think they'd deal any starters during the season. They're banking on it HARD that this is the year. They have a lot of good-looking starter prospects and two solid guys ( 3 if Psycho Zambrano doesn't take a step backwards ) up there now. They can afford to lose Clement, IMO.

While I do believe that Evil King George wants to win badly, I think this deal has at least as much ( if not more ) to do with sticking it to the Red Sox. I think that as soon as the ARod for Manny deal fell through and the need for a 3B arose, George told his people to see if ARod would mind playing 3B. The Evil Empire Strikes Back....Again... How do you think the martyrs in Boston are taking THIS development???

I heard Brooooth Levine talking about that this morning on WMVP. It will make them the undeniable favorites in their division, and a definite threat to win it all. They have question marks, for sure, but they're also very solid in most areas.

Short list right now: Husker Du - Could You Be The One? Blackbox - Most Of My Life Afghan Whigs - My Enemy Afghan Whigs - Something Hot Athenaeum - Unnoticed Chequered Past - How Much Is Too Much Naked Raygun - Vanilla Blue

Make me a 6-pack of Jessica Albas and call a paramedic in about an hour!! ( I'll probably need the paramedic after getting my ass kicked by 6 Jessica Albas for trying something! )

He may be 50, but he looks much older than that. He strikes me as a Tony Bennett style of crooner now - would that be fair to say? My wife kinda likes him, but aside from a couple of songs ( Downtown Train and My Heart Can't Tell You No - an absolutely great song ) I've never been much of a fan. I hope you have a GREAT time, Steff, and I hope he's in as fine a voice as he can muster.

Well, then keep Kenny out of the clubhouse when Frank's showering and everything should be OK.