The Critic

Fans are stupid, especially when drunk? As for players.....roid rage?

...and staying ahead of the Injuns for that ALL-IMPORTANT second-place money...

I bet they buy the name back, like MLB bought Angelos. Everything old is new again, the whole RETRO craze and everything. Two teams have failed there, so let's see if the third time is the charm. My condolences to the 3,000 Expos fans.

Yep. Congrats to Reed, but the Sox needed a front-of-the-rotation pitcher and Freddy was the best one available. Pitching > Outfielders

Question for the "Get Jose Guillen" contingent: Is Milton Bradley a good enough hitter to ignore HIS antics and get him on the Sox?

Actually, I got my hands on the original message Shingo wrote, and the Sox seem to have "cleaned it up" a little. Here's the original Shingo message: "Holla Holla Playazz, Yeah yeah yeah, sup? It's me it's me, it's the S to the T! Jus wanna give BIG UPS to my playazz on the SOUTH SIYEEEED! It wuz MAD FUN playin for y'all in 2004, yo! I was in Tha Pan for 13 yearz n s***, but they never RAISED THA ROOF like mah dawgs in Chi-Town! At first I wuz a little trepidacious bout tha Stizzatez, but y'all took me IN, an' dat made mah summer OFF THA HOOK! Y'all weatha is DOPE in tha summer, but I froze off my nizzutz in April n May - DAMN! Tha reason I made tha trip ova here wuz ta TES' mahself aginst tha MLB playaz, an tes' mah experience n s***. I ain't changin mah game for NO muthaf***azz - I can't blow no s*** by NOBODAYY, so's I gotsta trick these tricks, knowumsayin'? I wuz HYPE to see that MLB tricks fall fo that s*** jus' like Japanese muthaf***azz. In Japan, we can't say s*** to no old f***z, but here we can talk s*** to ANYBODY, an' that's cool as hell. Tha OG iz a cool-ass busta to play for - he keeps it real and don't stress nobody bout no little b**** s***! We try n win n s***, but we gets our play on too! This season been WACK, but we ain't stressin'. Gonna stick that s*** to some punks to end tha year an' keep the eyez on tha future - whutz past is past, can't bring s*** back. Props again to mah peeps, and much love and respect! Shingo OUT!" Who knew Shingo was so "down"?

I don't even have a cell phone. My wife has one for when she's in the car - I'd hate for her to have mechanical problems and no phone. I slap on my Walkman and read a book - excellent methods to avoid hearing the people who ARE talking too loudly to each other or on their phones. Cell phone = good invention gone horribly wrong.

Been there too. Used to work a shift unavailable by public trans. STILL wouldn't take a pay cut. I GOT TO GET THE DOLLAZZ TO FILL MY NEEDS, BABAYYYYYY!!!!!

If you're dealing PK, Carlos AND Garland, plus losing Ordonez to FA, you'd better be getting 2 better-than-Garland pitchers AND another bat besides Guillen in return. Another thing to consider is that the Sox are losing that LEGENDARY CLUBHOUSE LEADER, josE6 valentin(e), so to lose that leadership and add a cancer could be dangerous.

Not me. I'd take the same pay, but not a cut. I still remember my last "pay cut" 8 years ago when my company relocated and I went 3 months without work. That sucked ass. I'm okay with public transportation - it's far from great, but I can deal with it just fine.

No, before that. Joan Rivers used to be the "designated guest host" and was assumed to be the successor-in-waiting. Then they decided to go with Letterman and then the drama with Leno came about.

"...a few well-placed doilies brighten up the look of the cell, while also blocking my view of the gang-rapings and stabbings going on just down the hall...." While she's not going to THAT kind of prison, it's a funnier image than the country club she'll be in.

...the gag refle-fle-fle-fle-fle-flex..... Hungry like a has-been in the alley behind the Denny's, more like... I'm having flashbacks to the early 80s, when my sister was playing that garbage while I was TRYING to listen to Kill Em All!!! GRRRRRRRRR....little sisters.....

It's time to start the "Conan O'Brien Five-Year Don't Say Anything That Can Get Me Fired Plan". ...of course, wasn't Joan Rivers the logical successor to Johnny Carson at one point? Five years is a LONG time, so it's not like they couldn't change their minds anyhow.

Quote from Justin Gage, courtesy of the Sun-Times: "He wouldn't get up. I said, 'Rex, you all right?' He said, 'No, I'm done.' " Headline says Bears fear he could be done for the season. I guess until the waiver wires get a good scouring, let the Jonathan Quinn Era BEGIN!!!! :puke

Mine was a day-and-a-half stocking vending machines. Holy s***, did that suck ass. Get up at 3am, drive to the warehouse, load the truck, drive downtown, wait FOREVER for a spot on the dock to open up, then fill the f***ing things, take the money out and on to the next location. And since I was "the new guy", of course I got the s***tiest route. There was a factory where I had to take so many turns that I eventually ended up on a dirt road and I had no idea where the f*** I was. Then NOBODY in the entire building spoke English. THEN as I'm removing the money, I see a bunch of these guys looking at me....you ever see the old-time cartoons where a wolf looks at a chicken and then you see the chicken turn into a cooked chicken on a plate? THAT was the look I was getting. I honestly, seriously thought I was gonna get attacked for like 25 bucks worth of change. And to top it off, the pay was AWFUL. I guess you'd make good money once you were there 100 years and got the primo routes ( "primo" meaning you weren't waiting for 45 minutes for a downtown dock spot and nobody wanted to kill you for a bag of change ), but the new guys made NOTHING. When I see their "roach coaches" driving around I still get a little pissed off, and it was a day-and-a-half, seven years ago. Thank God for my job now!

On my way home from work tonight, around 2:15am or so, I encountered a complete standstill of traffic on I-90 near Division. I was able to get off at Milwaukee, thankfully I was in the right lane. So I tuned into WGN to see what was up - they're ALWAYS the first station to report this kind of thing. So details are still sketchy as I write this around 3:20am, but apparently two people on a motorcycle were traveling at a high rate of speed when they ran into the back of a car. One is apparently dead, and the other is in REALLY bad shape, from what they know right now. Seems like a rash of this type of thing lately - I really hope people take the hint and drive a little smarter on those things. Too much death on wheels lately...

Simmons is the KING. I haven't noticed any dropoff. He can make almost any topic funny and worth reading. I love his column and read it religiously! Sports Guy! Simmons, Corolla and Kimmel are friends, so I'm not surprised at all to see that he writes some of the same stuff Adam says. My buddies and I have catchphrases and opinions that we share, so I would assume that they do too - they just have theirs appear on multiple media formats. Not a big deal to me.

Well, the Sox fell short of 2 million for attendance this year, but kudos to the fans for coming out this year! Had the Sox stayed in contention, they would have drawn 2.5 mil for sure - but they faded, so there you have it. ....hey, at least JR has to pay rent this year, right? to the 1.93 million!!

From the "Scurrilous" section of the Sun-Times: "Great news for hockey fans: the NHL season is back on. But hold it, Blackhawk fans - don't get your Chris Chelios sweater out of the closet yet. The season is going to be televised on G4 TechTV. For other networks, the NHL's current labor dispute might make this somewhat problematic. Technophiles know, however, that virtual athletes are never in a lockout. Beginning Oct. 13, Comcast-owned, G4 TechTV is broadcasting video-game versions of all 1,230 regular season competitions. Stanley Cup Champions Tampa Bay Lightning play the Philadelphia Flyers in the first game. Even the network's sports program "Sweat" is getting in on the action, with highlights, scores and stats airing daily. All that and more information also will be available online at www.g4techtv.com, according to the people's news agency, AP." Video-game simulated NHL games on television????

Well, I've been giving this a lot of thought and I feel I can finally reply with my truest feelings: AHHHHHHH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! !!!!!!!!! I hope that over-rated, self-obsessed, contender-ducking, egomaniacal blowhole gets PUMMELLED like that every time he steps into the ring! In the immortal words of the WWE's Jim Ross: "I'd like to buy him for what he's worth and sell him for what he THINKS he's worth!" Maybe now that his carefully crafted phony aura of invincibility has been shattered he can find a minor-league basketball team or minor-league rap label to take him. This has been a pretty decent year for boxing - Tyson, DeLaHoya and Jones have all felt the 10-count - NICE! That's the nice thing about boxing - the call to go away is not registered by continuous 0-for-4's with 3 K's ( HEY, that sounds like Borchard! ) or by 3-for-23 shooting nights ( HEY, it's the Wizard Jordan! ) or by 1.5 yard-per-carry averages ( HEY, lookit Emmitt Smith! ). No, in boxing the retirement party consists of multiple punches to the head and body, and the message is BYE OR DIE! Too bad Holyfield won't get the message until he's doing card tricks with Muhammed Ali.

I wish it was a team I like competing against the Cubs for the Wild Card. As it is, it's two teams I don't really care about slugging it out. First the Marlins crap out, now the Astros are sputtering, and the Padres never really had a serious chance at it - not yet, not this year. Makes it easier to ignore, though, so that's good....

I honestly don't care one way or the other if the Cubs win or lose any game. A lot of my family likes them, so they'd be happy if the Cubs won something. But if they lose again, the vast majority of their fanbase would find some other scapegoat and celebrate that. Either way it doesn't make me happy, angry or sad - it used to, but it doesn't anymore. As far as the "longest streak without a WS win" goes, the only way I'd be upset about the Cubs winning is if they beat the White Sox to do it. Sorry if that makes me "less of a Sox fan".... :rolly

WOW! What a GREAT documentary. Funny, insightful, kinda bittersweet - a REALLY good look at one of punk's pioneering bands. I recommend it to anyone who has any interest at all in the punk scene of the 70's. One really funny scene is of an early gig where they start bickering on stage about what song to play - it has to be seen to be appreciated. There's LOTS of cool onstage footage from all stages of their career, from 10 people at CBGB to 30,000 in South America. And LOTS of interviews with all the players - Joey, Johnny, DeeDee, Tommy, Marky, Richie and CJ! I'm DEFINITELY buying the DVD whenever it comes out for sale!!! GABBA GABBA HEY!!!!

While I'm interested in seeing what happens this offseason, I don't know that "excited" is the word I'd use. With the presumption that either PK or CLee may be dealt, and that Magglio likely won't be re-signed, that means that 2 out of 3 of my favorite Sox players will be gone. Assume as I do that anything the Sox do via free agency will be minor ( and NO, I don't have a crystal ball or anything, I am just pessimistic about the Sox spending money ) and that adds up to another underwhelming offseason. MAN, I hope I'm wrong...