Quin

Sir, it's FASTs. I know Grifol doesn't understand that he could have just done "Technical" or "Tactical" instead of "Technically sound," so it is our duty to give it proper respect.

That's the Royal way baby

You're right he earned the roster spot

Justice for Korey

Maldonado's batting average: .059

Prepare for the world where Touki is somehow our all-star rep

A's fans have turned to hate, which burns bright and Fischer's extreme incompetence gives a modicum of hope that Vegas falls through. We have turned to a dark despair, praying to the Glum Lord to free us from the iron grasp of a competent (at keeping a bad status quo) Reinsdorf after having a bright flame taken from us. All hail the Glum Lord!

Glum Lord International, obviously. Serviced by FASTs Airlines and run by Superintendent Getz.

Blink twice if you're being held hostage

The Athletic surveyed fanbases for 2024, unsurprisingly, Sox fans are nearly last (Rockies are #30). Last year they were #23, in 2022 they were #9. Clearly, Pedro inspires greatness! Awesome decision to keep him!

I'm gonna call Nastrini, Quero, Leasure, Eder, Bush and Lee the Hahn-core..

Hahn's greatest moment of lawyer speak was when he wasn't as bad as people make him out to be, but based on team performance wasn't as good enough to win Exec of the Year Dude was like "remember when I got accolades? Clearly that means I'm not bad, but also, I'm not good."

Homie is the Zapp Brannigan of Getz stans.

how much use do we get out of this this year

I mean, we understand it. Pedro is desperate for "veteran leaders" (who don't run to first) that he's familiar with from his time with the Royals and they're riding the coattails of Maldonado's reputation and ignoring the last 5 years of his career as a hitter and last two as a defender (2022 as average, 2023 as worst). It's very easy to understand. It's just fucking stupid.

But I was told pitchers would be banging down the door to play on a team with DeJong, Lopez and Maldonado supporting them

Lee to Maldonado:

When people said "Eaton lite" they meant 2021 Eaton

I know, Spring Training, but if Korey Lee keeps this up and Martin Maldonado continues being the worst major league hitter on the team, is Maldonado gonna be the recipient of the Jeff Keppinger award?

Notable cool-head, never starts drama, wonderful for the clubhouse Brad Keller

I honestly saw the lineup and asked myself "who the f*** is Jake Woodford?"

This, Dominic Fletcher, and possibly not starting Crochet in Charlotte to stretch out just scream "we're gonna rush this rebuild."

Tired: The Bears are acquiring all these weapons for Caleb Wired: Trading down from 1 to acquire even more weapons for Fields Inspired: Fields is going to become a gadget player. Hilarity ensues.